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ARTArticleThree Steps To Making Your Divorce Easier"All the world's a stage, And all the men and women merely players; They have their exits and their entrances, And one man in his time plays many parts, His acts being seven ages." -Shakespeare As You Like It Act 2, scene 7, 139-143 ARTArticleTips for Handling Extreme Religious DifferencesAre you a modern day Romeo and Juliet? Are you dealing with as much pain and struggle making your impossible relationship decisions as your fanciful predecessors? Recently this heart wrenching question was submitted to our online relationship advice column: "What do I do, my boy friend is an ...ARTArticleTop Ten List of What to Do and What Not to Do in RelationshipsMost of us who have been intimately involved with someone beyond the infatuation stage know that relationships are like a rollercoaster ride. When things are good, they are very, very good. When things are bad, they are very, very bad. As a relationship coach, I have developed Top 10 Lists---one ...ARTArticleTop Ten Ways to Teach Values to Your KidsIn a consumer-driven society that broadcasts values that don’t reflect what you believe, how can you teach values to your kids? Here are ten ideas to help you: 1. Tell them your life stories and teach through your stories Kids love to hear stories about your childhood. Weave in some moral ...ARTArticleToxic Guilt, Healthy GuiltGuilt is an important feeling. It is the appropriate feeling to have when we have deliberately done something hurtful or harmful to others. People who can harm others without any feelings of guilt or remorse were formerly called sociopaths or psychopathic personalities, and are now defined as ...ARTArticleTrue HappinessTrue Happiness Most people look outside of themselves as the cause of their unhappiness or frustration. After all, wouldn’t life be practically perfect if the significant people in our lives would simply do things the way we want them to or do what we think is best for them? Actually, this is ...ARTArticleTwo Choices That can Make Next Year The Best Year of Your LifeWhat if there were just two choices you could make to insure that next year would be wonderful? There actually are, and these choices are quite simple in concept, yet not easy to do. They are not things you do on the outside, such as exercising your body (which is always a good thing to do!) but ...ARTArticleUnlived LoveA dear friend reminded me that we have all been wounded in some way by what he calls unlived love. As we find those pockets within us, where we yearned to love, but were not able to give or receive it in the way we wished, we experience pain. It is the pain of love that was not freely given—or love that was not returned. Most devastating of all, perhaps, is remembering how we ourselves could have given love, but held back because we did not recognize what was needed in that moment.ARTArticleWhat Are Your Feelings Telling You?Our feelings are an incredible instant feedback system regarding what is good for us and what is bad for us. For example, our physically painful feelings let us know that something needs attending to regarding our physical body. If you put your hand on a hot stove, the burning feeling ...ARTArticleWhat Does it Mean to “Self Improve?”Self Improvement has become mainstream. In the last few years, since I have been writing articles and submitting them to article sites, I’ve noticed that the category of “Self Improvement” has been showing up lately when it was never there before. To me, this is very good news. But what does it ...ARTArticleWhat I Wish I Could Have Told Pilar and DeionPilar and Deion made a big mistake. Yeah, I know that's an obvious statement and you're probably of the opinion that they've made several big mistakes since they decided to divorce. But the mistake I'm talking about probably isn't all that obvious. In fact, many people probably thought it was a good idea because they have kids. The big mistake they made, that could have prevented many of the problems they've had and forced the networks to report on some other bits of news, is that they decided to continue living in the same house after deciding to divorce.ARTArticleWhat to Do If You're a Victim of Domestic Violence - 5 Sources of HelpWhat should you do if you are a victim of domestic violence? You should get help, even if you are not sure you are ready to leave the relationship. Here are five sources of help that are available to you, each of which has various benefits.ARTArticleWhat to do if Your Spouse Won't Go to Counseling"What should I do if my spouse won't go to counseling?" I often hear this from my clients. What are they really saying with this question? Generally, they are saying something like: "My unhappiness is coming from my spouse's behavior," or "The problems in our marriage are my spouses' fault," ...ARTArticleWhat You Don't Know Can Hurt YouEverybody has blind spots. You have certain tendencies that you are not aware of but others can see. These are your blind spots, and they often cause big problems. You may not want to accept that your life style is responsible for your high cholesterol and that you are courting a heart attack. ...ARTArticleWhat's Your Dating and Relationship IQIntelligence comes in many forms. In spite of this, however, our society focuses almost exclusively on academic intelligence. Think about it. When is the last time someone said, “John has really high relationship intelligence. He has a skill for listening and understanding people. He must have a ...ARTArticleWhen Does a Relationship Qualify As Abusive? What Are Boundaries That Must Not Be CrossedWhen does a relationship qualify as abusive? One of the ways to answer that question is to look at boundaries that must never be crossed. Boundaries are intended to protect you as a valued person in a relationship. There are four boundaries that abusive people violate because they do not see you as a separate person with rights:ARTArticleWhen Will I Stop Hurting So MuchLoneliness is one of the first most painful emotions to appear when you get divorced. Even if you were lonely in your marriage, it's just somehow different when you are living alone. Yes, this is true even if you have children living with you.ARTArticleWhen Your Man Dumped You, This Is What You Have To DoAre you a dumped girlfriend? What does it take to move on after a guy has broken up with you? Do you want to move on, but are paralyzed by sadness? Here is a dumped girlfriend guide to moving on. While Still Mou ing, Do Realize That You Can Still Seduce Your Ex Back. Here's How: The Ultimate Method of Getting Your Ex Back ARTArticleWhy Do People Lie?Amanda and Ron had been married for six years and had two small children. I had counseled them during some difficult times in their marriage, but had not heard from them for a while. Then Amanda scheduled an emergency phone session with me. She was very upset. “I just found out that Ron’s been ...ARTArticleWhy Do You Want to "Communicate" With Your Partner?When partners are having problems, they often say that the problem is communication. What exactly does this mean? What are they trying to communicate? There are various reasons for communicating: 1. Sometimes we communicate to offer information about ourselves, such as, "I'm going out for a ...ARTArticleWhy I Always Loved Dating Women with ChildrenAs a Dating and Relationship Coach I'd heard single moms bemoan the idea that men do not want to date women with children but let me share why I always loved dating women with children.ARTArticleWhy Love Is a Choice, Not an EmotionWhy is love a choice and not an emotion? The emotional component of love that we associate with feeling "loving" isn't consistent. For a relationship to be solid, there has to be consistency. Choosing to love means one will choose actions that demonstrate love regardless of the emotion that is felt (1 Corinthians 13). Here are five things that you choose to do when you love someone whether you are feeling angry, disappointed, distant, hurt, upset, loving, irritated, happy, unhappy or anything else:ARTArticleWhy Rebound Relationship Rarely WorksIf you are a single woman over 30 and are actively dating, likelihood is you'll find many divorced men -recent or not- as your potential suitors. You -and your ex that you are not over with- are even perhaps on a rebound yourself! We all go through transitional relationships at one point or another.ARTArticleWIN THE “YEAH BUT” GAME in 5 Easy StepsWIN THE “YEAH BUT” GAME in 5 Easy Steps You know the game, don’t you? Someone invites you to helpthem solve a big problem and every great suggestion you makeis met with, “Yeah, but that won’t work because….” Frustratedand defeated, you finally give up. Next time someone tells you about a ...ARTArticleYour Children are on Their Own Soul's JourneyIn a phone session with Gerald, one of my clients, he expressed to me that he was feeling very sad about his son, Luc. Luc, 29 years old, was not doing much with his life, and Gerald was berating himself for how he had parented Luc. “I should have spent more time with him. I should have ...ARTArticleYour Thoughts Matter!We all have hundreds of thousands of thoughts every day. Time to get up. I'm hungry. Who's calling? Why haven't they sent that email yet? I have so much to do. Do I look fat? How am I going to solve this problem? Why isn't my atto ey returning my call? If s/he would just reconsider, I know we could work it out. How could I be so stupid? Could this be cancer?ARTArticle“I Feel Overwhelmed”I often hear from my clients that they feel overwhelmed. Generally, feeling overwhelmed means one of three things: - Overwhelmed by their feelings - Overwhelmed by time pressures - Overwhelmed by how to do things 'right' The feeling of overwhelm is generally caused by how we are treating ourselves and what we are telling ourselves. Peter In my Skype session with Peter, he told me at the beginning of the session that he felt overwhelmed.ARTArticle“No More Running; I Can Stand Up For Myself.”A Deeper Look at the Pleasing Personality in a Work Setting… As I sat down, I asked Judy how her week had gone. Her reply, “Definitely not good.” So, I asked if something had happened. Yes, something had. Judy is an engineering consultant. She has a degree and 20 years of experience in her field. She’s been freelancing now for about 7 or 8 years with different companies, all in the pharmaceutical industry.ARTArticle***A Problem with Today's ParentingThere was an interesting article in The Atlantic, entitled "How to Land Your Kid in Therapy: Why the obsession with our kids' happiness may be dooming them to unhappy adulthoods. A therapist and mother reports." http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2011/07/how-to-land-your-kid-in-therapy/8555/ The article is about the way many parents focus much of their energy on being there for their children, but their children end up feeling lost and empty.ARTArticle***Are you Inspiring or Gloomy?"You find yourself refreshed by the presence of cheerful people. Why not make an honest effort to confer that pleasure on others? Half the battle is gained if you never allow yourself to say anything gloomy." --Julia Child, 1912-2004, Chef, Author and Television Personality What is your primary intention with others - to share uplifting, caring energy, or to get sympathy? Getting Sympathy

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