3 Things One Should Think Over Before Heading For Divorce
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Irreconcilable differences are the reason commonly cited for divorce. It is very disheartening to see two people, who immensely loved each other, shared happiness and sorrow, been together for a fairly long time, decide to part ways.
One question that comes to my mind is how can love fail? There are innate bonds which stay for life time: those which we share with our parents, siblings and children. Why is it that in spite of conflicts, misunderstandings and differences we still hang on with these relationships and not think of divorce? The relationship a man and wife share is the purest and most intimate of all relationships. Thus it's time to think over, think about the love that binds people together.
Before you take any decision or come to any conclusions regarding your relationship take some time off and think over these issues:
Your contribution: how much have you contributed to your relationship? What efforts have you put in to keep it going? If you have been a demanding partner then it is likely that you have been the reason for the troubles. Are you a person easily influenced by others, are you too reserved to express yourself, too weak to assert your feelings or are you very adamant, having your own say? These things definitely influence compatibility in a relationship. Make a list of everything you have done to keep your partner happy and what your partner has done to keep you happy. This will give you a clear picture about the nature of your relationship.
Identifying the problem: question yourself about what lacks in your relationship: respect for each other, lack of trust, problems with each other's family or financial issues. Most often circumstances create a huge rift between a husband and wife that gets too tough to be bridged. Every relationship has its share of good and bad times, its strength depends on how well you respond and deal with conflicting situations. A common example is a financial crisis: any one spouse losing out a job is enough to add fuel to a happy life; depression, misunderstandings, unreasonable fights, and a lot more follow to make things worse. The strength of a relationship depends on how well you cope with each other to win over the situation without underestimating or hurting the sentiments of either of the two. Another example is that of a long distance relationship. Most often work comes in-between two people, leaving no option but to stay apart from each other; here trust holds the two individuals together. Lack of trust and lack of good communication can ruin any relationship.
Let down your Ego: we all have a Super Ego, an ego which meddles with our thought processes. This ego prevents us from making the first move, hinders our attempts to reconcile which sub-consciously gets suppressed in our minds. When couples fight this super ego prevents them from admitting mistakes, correcting them and apologizing for the wrong done. A lot of couples have disagreements on day- to- day matters, which does not mean they are incompatible. Why should I apologize I was right on my part? So what if I was too rude in justifying myself it is her mistake after all! - Thoughts that commonly occur. It might be just a phone call or a message that can set things on track, help you forget the bitte
ess and bring you together. So let go!
When people get into bad relationships where there is no end to suffering: divorce is the only option and solution. But when two people who are committed to each other for lifetime, decide to part ways due to irreconcilable differences, love loses its value and the faith people invest on it. Perfect relationships are not tailor-made; they have to be worked upon with dedication and devotion.
Falling in love is quite easy but sustaining this love in a relationship is the greatest challenge of one's life!
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