***Dad Is An Empty Nester – Son Knows

Written by Natalie Caine, M.A.

“I am heading to college in August, miles away from Dad. I know he wants this “last” Father’s Day to be over the top. He wrote it on the refrigerator, bathroom mirror, and my sock drawer in peanut butter. DO SOMETHING FOR ME. What am I suppose to do, turn back the clock?”

As you can sense, this son is wise, cares, and just doesn’t know how to celebrate his dad. Son still is the child although older than before but his head is not thinking about sweet dad, it is thinking about saying goodbye to his high school girlfriend and best friends, and wondering if he made the right college choice. He told me he feels so grateful for his dad who has raised him alone but just doesn’t want to make a big deal about anything right now. BBQ and a card would due for him, especially if he could invite his girlfriend and buddies over after they spend time with their dad. What to do?

Here’s the idea he chose after exploring feelings and options: He surprised himself.

He went to a place they use to throw ball (the photo in the blog) and sat on the cool grass writing a letter to the man who has had his back and bottom for his entire life. Writing isn’t his strength but he let go of the perfectionist. He simply kept the words falling on the paper. He didn’t edit. He didn’t care about the grammar because that would have tripped up his heart.

“DAD, I am an almost man. Same three letter word…man….Dad.

I am not the same as you and you never asked me to be. I am the one who you decided to carry, step back from, run to, and answer the phone when the moon was almost a sun. I don’t forget that ever. I won’t forget YOU ever. You carry me. I carry you in my head to be a good person not a hurter. You and I know I have hurt you and my friends. I know I am still carried by you.

Just stick around, Dad, so I can carry you with your shoulders finally down and my raised higher. Stick around Dad because now the big band will play for you. When you are empty at home know you have filled me. I will spill and make a mess but I know where the mop and bucket sit. Stick around Dad.

I never want you to fall away from my path. Catch this… I LOVE YOU, DAD and I WILL BE BACK.”

Happy Father’s Day to all the Dad’s who have carried their children.

Celebrate them,

Natalie