Five Proven Techniques To Reduce Stress For The Take Charge Working Mama
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Not surprisingly, women are more vulnerable to stress in comparison to men. And, I would have to say that is even more so for working mothers! Working mothers experience a multitude of tugs for their time, attention, and energy. Along with the pulls, working moms place unreasonable expectations on themselves and believe they should do it all and with perfection! All of which can contribute to higher levels of stress. A recent study from Michigan State University found that although working fathers in dual-ea
ing households are increasing the amount of child care and housework that they perform, working mothers are still multi-tasking 10 hours more per week, on average, more than their husbands. Additionally, working fathers and mothers respond differently to multi-tasking. Fathers appear to be prideful and feel good about their multi-tasking abilities. However, mothers report feeling negative emotions, such as stress and guilt.
Stress can take a physical AND emotional toll on health. It is reported that as much as two-thirds of medical visits in the U.S. are for stress-related illnesses, such as heart disease, cancer, respiratory disorders, unintentional injuries, cirrhosis of the liver, and suicide.
On an emotional level, stress over extended periods of time can lead to overwhelm, which may ultimately result in clinical depression. Working mothers may feel that they are failing in all areas of their life and unable to keep up with the demands placed upon their time and energy. Many may often feel guilty because they are unable to successfully "be present" and "in the moment". When they are at work, they are thinking about their children and what they "should" be doing for their family. When they are with their children, they are thinking about work and what they "should" be doing for their career. Such feelings of failure and guilt may lead to stress-related depression.
5 empowering steps that working moms can do to TAKE CHARGE of their stress levels and feel good about life are the following:
1) Examine and realign expectations: Are the expectations you have of yourself realistic and attainable? This is self-imposed stress and it can be the most debilitating of all. It saps us of energy and causes our self-esteem to plummet. Nobody is capable of giving 100 percent, 100 percent of the time. It is not humanly possible. Oftentimes we are our own worst critic and have higher expectations of ourselves than anyone else has of us (e.g., perfectionism). Come to grips with the fact that you are doing the best you can with the resources you have available.
2) Assess your priorities: There are two critical questions you can ask yourself in an effort to assess your priorities to alleviate stress. They are as follows: 1) Is this particular task/situation a high priority or a low priority (e.g., will it matter 10 years from now?); 2) Is it easy to change or completely out of my control? From your answers to those questions you will determine where it is best to put your time and energy. Not every issue or situation is worth the attention we give it; sometimes we stress over things that really don't matter, or things we can't change.
3) Set boundaries: Working moms often want to do it all and may find difficulty in setting limits and boundaries when asked by others for assistance or a favor. It is important for women to recognizing self-care as a priority in order to assertively set and maintain boundaries. Saying "no" is empowering and is more than okay to do in an effort to keep your sanity and the sanity of your family.
4) Maintain structure to your day: Routines and rituals that include exercise, relaxation, support and connection through social interaction, can help working moms maintain good physical and emotional health, while buffering stress.
5) Focus on the present: This one tip can help immensely! Focusing on the past (e.g., "I should have done …") and that which has already occurred is a trigger for depression. Focusing on the future (e.g., "What if _____ happens?") and what you cannot control is a trigger for anxiety. Focus on the present and enjoy each and every moment!
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About the Author
Dr. Marla Enhelder, Working Mom Coach & Mentor, is founder of Take Charge Mama. A company devoted to empowering working moms to live their best life through balancing a thriving family, fulfilling career, and a blissful self! To get your F.R.E.E. Audio CD by mail and receive her weekly newsletter packed with information rich tips that you can implement immediately, visit http://www.takechargemama.com
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