Forgiving the Past

To forgive our past, we first have to face and resolve any unfinished business from our past choices. This means every pattern, choice, and grievance must be examined, like turning over river stones, without hiding behind the facade of excuses. Then, to attain closure, in addition to spiritually releasing our patterns it is also necessary to clean up any physical residue associated with them by getting rid of emotionally charged possessions or gifts, closing bank accounts, changing titles on properties, and letting go of old wedding rings. A memorable scene in the movie Harold and Maude depicts Maude achieving physical closure by taking off her wedding ring and throwing it into the water.

Releasing the layers of patterns is a lifelong process because their residue never completely goes away; instead, the layers become subtler and more difficult to discern. Even when we eliminate a pattern, the brain continues to show us a phantom of it. Like a file that we have deleted from our hard drive, its energy as a virtual hologram can still surface physically, alerting us to the past and reminding us to stay true to ourselves. Fortunately, we can reduce its energetic charge by acknowledging our awareness of it, saying, whenever it surfaces, “Hello, pattern, here you are again” and perceiving it only as a phantom of the past.

Examine and forgive your past. Take a written or verbal inventory of your unresolved grievances by asking yourself these questions: “What past or present memories, situations, or relationships require forgiveness and healing?” “Am I holding on to grievances against others and am I afraid to let go of them?” “How has harboring resentment against another person or myself interfered with my spiritual growth?”