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Parents, Teach These 3 Social Skills And Stop Worrying!"

Topic: ParentingBy Jea Tracy, MSSPublished Recently added

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Teach these 3 simple social skills to your child and stop worrying whether kids like him. Most kids say or do things that turn other kids off. This doesn't have to be your child when he learns the social skills you are about to teach him. n
"Chris, 9, ordered his best friend to help him do his book report. With his hands on his hips, Josh screamed back, 'Who do you think you are? I'm not your serpent!"' n
Social Skill Problem for Bossy Kids: n
Pretend your child is Chris. If he bosses kids to do his bidding, don't expect kids to like him. He needs to understand that other kids have feelings. They don't like bossy voices. They don't like bossy orders and they don't want to obey bossy kids. Your son needs to speak in a friendly voice, give choices, and accept his friend's answer. But how do you teach him? n
Social Skill Solution for Bossy Kids: n
Parents, tell him to role-play how he acted. Then role-play how he could have acted better. When he has the right voice, the right words, and the right attitude, congratulate him. Tell him to practice with other kids and then tell you the results.

Social Skill Problem for Cranky Kids: n
Kids never forget what an angry friend says. If you have a grumpy child, teach her to act friendly even if she is in a bad mood. This can be difficult. Tell your child that every second she carries anger she gives up a moment of happiness. And every sharp word she uses cuts off possible friendships.

Social Skill Solution for Cranky Kids: n
Parents, to understand that anger is a heavy burden, invite her to go for a long walk with you. Give her a large rock to carry in her backpack with the word "anger" on it. At the end of the walk discuss what she felt as she carried "anger." Hopefully, it was heavy enough to be uncomfortable. Tell her that's how others feel when she's grumpy. Being cranky is not the way to win friends. Ask her to try treating others with friendliness. Compliment her when she smiles and act pleasant with others. n
Social Skill Problem for Shy Kids:

Shyness can be painful. Genes, put-downs, and habits can all add to a child's shyness. It doesn't feel good to be ignored. It doesn't feel good to be told, "You're not good enough." It hurts when you don't know how to break the habit of shyness and make friends. n
Social Skill Solution for Shyness: n
Parents, ask your child, "Do you feel shy? Would you like to make friends?” Tell him:

"Shyness is like wearing dark colored glasses. When your glasses are very dark, no one can see your eyes. It's like you're hiding your eyes and your feelings behind the dark glasses. When shy people hide behind dark glasses they often keep their mouths zipped too. Ask your child, "Would you like to try wearing lighter colored glasses and speak a little more too?"

If your child says "Yes," create a calendar that lists school days. When he returns from school ask him, "Which colored glasses did you wear today, dark, tan, or clear? Dark means he felt and acted very shy. Tan means he talked to kids. Clear means he talked, played, and had fun with kids. Use stars on the calendar to track changes.

Social Skills Conclusion: n
Whether your children are bossy, grumpy, or shy, you can help. The social skill seeds you plant today will help them throughout their lives. Stop worrying whether they're making friends. Instead teach them how to make friends. You can do it. I know you can.n n

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About the Author

Jean Tracy, MSS publishes a Free Parenting Newsletter. Subscribe at www.KidsDiscuss.com and receive 80 fun activities to share with your kids. Pick up your Social Skills Kit for Kids at www.kidsdiscuss.com/parent_resource_center.asp?pr_id=kd011 and feel the joy from watching your children make friends.

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