Peace Through Inner Resolution ~ Healing from the Inside Out

On 9 – 11, I was experiencing my own 911. For years, I had attempted to push down my fears, traumas, grief, anger and resentments, only to find that my life was getting to be more painful to live. It was becoming harder to deny the deep feelings of emptiness and bitte ess that I was experiencing. On the outside, folks saw me as being confident, happy and well adjusted; little did they know that I was quietly dying inside. It’s interesting, how we think we know who each of us are. We can put on a mask or masks and pretend to the world that all is well. Yet, that imposter part of us will often wake us up in middle of the night, crying out to be released and healed. Either way, that part will eventually get our attention. It will show up as broken relationships, a loss of a job, a death or an addiction. It will get your attention in the area that you are most vulnerable to. The question is, when that happens, how will you process it? Will you take the stance of a victim, or will you become the victor? As a nation, we are all, in some ways being called to look at areas in our life where we are wearing a mask that may no longer be serving us. This reality can be painful and a bit frightening especially if we have been living it for a long time. In my own life, I am going through a shift in my financial arena. For years, I have had the opportunity to live a life full of travels, luxuries and little worry about money. The mask I wore, was one of being cavalry with how money came to me so easily and effortlessly. My steady source of income came from an inheritance. Now due to a variety of circumstances, that is dwindling and I find myself at times in a place of fear and anxiety, wondering if I can support myself. It’s interesting how life has a way of keeping us humble. What I am dealing with is what so many folks have dealt with for years. My life lesson now is to learn to trust my inner most ability and to heal that part deep within that feels helpless and hopeless. So how does one start? For myself, I have found that taking a personal inventory of my life has been a helpful way to begin removing my mask. This period of transition can be a time of tremendous growth and self-awareness, especially if one is able to befriend their inner critic. This inner critic is that part of our self that finds fault with decisions that were made in the past that may have contributed to the current situation. To be able to look at all areas of our life with a compassionate eye and an acute awareness enables us to look for solutions that create options. Being gentle with our self is a wonderful way to allow deep healing to occur, as we gently remove the mask that we have worn for years. Removing it may create some discomfort because of feeling emotionally vulnerable. Yet, if we can remind our self continuously, that at any given moment we are all doing the very best that we can, helps ease the discomfort. It may be true that perhaps different decisions could have been made yet it is a mote point to beat our selves up for what happened in the past. The way to change course is to become aware of how we want our lives to look. Begin setting realistic goals that include action steps that begin moving you toward your ideal life. As a way to quiet your mind and ease anxiety, practice sitting in stillness everyday. Begin to notice when anxiety builds and take time to breathe and return to a state of balance. With practice, you will notice when you are out of balance. Each time you notice, come back to your breath and back to yourself. Everyday, consciously take one action step in the direction you want to go. If this is done daily, there will be huge shifts. Remember that the mind moves much quicker than the physical world. It took a while to get to where you are in your life and it will take a while to shift it. Practice patience and perseverance. Finally, remind your self that this process is all part of a continuous jou ey that has no end. It’s how we show up in the moments of our life. These choice points help determine the direction in which we are going. Remaining flexible and open hearted to possibilities is the best way to fully embrace this jou ey we call Life. As we continue on this path, we will find many fellow travelers who are also learning to find their way during this period of transition. Together, we can offer support and guidance to one another knowing that we are not alone and that our connections with each other will never be broken.