Telling Kids about Divorce? Avoid These 6 Mistakes.

Getting psyched up to tell your children about your pending divorcen-- or separation? Not sure what to say? When to say it? How tonsay it? What to expect after the conversation? What to do next?
How do deal with your special circumstances? What therapists,nmediators, atto
eys, clergy and other professionals suggest you donand don't do to make things better all around? Well, you're notnalone.

Having the "divorce talk" with a child you love is one of thentoughest conversations you'll ever have. Shouldn't you be prepared?

Professionals all agree on some of the most common mistakes parents make when bringing up divorce or separation. These include:nn* asking children to bear the weight of making decisions ornchoosing sidesnn* failing to remind children that none of this is in any way their faultnn* forgetting to emphasize that Mom and Dad will still always bentheir Mom and Dad -- even after divorce!nn* confiding adult details to children in order to attract thei
allegiance or sympathynn* neglecting to repeatedly remind children that they are safe,ninnocent and very much loved nn* failing to explain clearly that everything is going to be okay!

These are just some of the most common messages that parents failnto convey because they're just not prepared -- and most probablynquite scared!

If you're about to tackle this tough conversation -- or you knownsomeone who is – there's help you can depend on to simplify thenprocess. Don’t wing it unprepared. You wouldn’t go on vacationnor plan a party without advanced preparation. Why tackle one ofnthe most important and emotionally charged talks you’ll ever havenwith your children without giving it just as much – if not more – nthought and attention?

If you’re not sure what to say and how to say it in age-appropriatenlanguage, there are many resources available to help you. Therapists nand mediators provide excellent personal guidance. Collaborative ndivorce atto
eys (those who specialize in creating non-adversarial ndivorce solutions) can be of great assistance at this time. So can nclergy, school Guidance Counselors and parenting experts. There arenmany articles and books written on the subject as well.

One unique and effective approach to having the tough break-the-news conversation is through the creation of a personalized family nstorybook – prepared in advance – with photos and fill-in-the-blankntemplates. To learn more about How Do I Tell the Kids about the
Divorce? A Create-a-Storybook™ Guide to Preparing Your Childrenn– with Love! visit http://www.howdoitellthekids.com. However you approach this challenging conversation, be prepared.
Understand the effects – both emotionally and psychologically – thisnnews can have on your children, and learn how to avoid the commonnmistakes parents can make when they haven’t done their homework nin advance. You and your children can survive -- and even thrive afte
divorce. Think before you leap and give your family a sound foundationnon which to face the changes ahead with security, compassion and love.nn nnnnnnn