Tips for Parenting Teens with Trust and Privacy
Written by Aidan Mitchel
Privacy and trust issues have always been sensitive subjects for parents and teen's relationship alike. Particulars like how much privacy is allowed and how much trust is to be given and how much privacy our teens need have always been complicated and difficult practical parenting decision. More and more parents nowadays are turning to parenting blog for parenting tips and parenting advice, just to glean insights on how to address these issues.
Nowadays, with teenagers spending a lot more time away from their parents, trust issues between parents and teens are more important than ever.
Every teen needs some privacy. The desire for more privacy is a natural part of being an adolescent. In order for them to learn to be independent people, they need to know that you respect them, their space, and their things. At the same time, teenagers still need your support and guidance to make good decisions. The key to finding a balance between your child's need for privacy and your need to know what's going on is trust. When we give our teens the privacy and trust they need, they become more independent and build their self-confidence. However, too much privacy is as bad, or worse, not enough. Balancing between knowing the things your teen is doing, trusting your teens to have some private matters, and knowing when to step in is a fine line that parents walk every day.
Privacy issues stem from trust issues. As the teen years is the period when our children are forming their own identities separate from us parents, the best we can do during those years as parents is to aim for a good relationship with our teenagers, and not expecting them to fully disclose everything going on in their lives. Time alone, their diary and conversations with friends are examples of private areas we can offer our teens.
Why do we need to monitor teens in what they are doing? In their way to being independent and gaining their own identities, teens tend to make mistakes and will need to be saved from themselves. Though our teens need privacy and our trust that they would make good decisions, too little monitoring can leave teenagers without the support they need to make safe decisions about risky behavior and relationships.
Our teen's privacy could never trump our responsibility of checking up on them. Monitoring your child is worth the effort. According to research, it consistently shows that teenagers whose parents monitor them well:
-Are less likely to get involved in antisocial behavior like stealing or violence -Engage less often in underage drinking or drug-taking start having sex later, and once they're sexually active, they practice safer sex -Are less likely to be depressed -Are more likely to have high self-esteem have better school outcomes and lower rates of school truancy and suspension -Are more likely to bounce back in high-risk environments (for example, crime-prone neighborhoods or poverty)
What can parents gain in respecting their privacy? As your child gets older, he or she tends to crave more privacy and more personal and psychological space. This is part of them dealing with big teenage challenges, such as working out what kind of person he is. In order to provide them support in their teenage years we need to respect their privacy and trust them enough. By respecting their privacy and trusting them enough, you and your teenage child will create a loving and trusting relationship, giving you less headache and problems.
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