\What's the Worst That Could Happen?

Does fear stop you doing what you truly want to?

Illegal, immoral or anti-social behaviour is never acceptable, but aside from this even today there is still a perception of what is accepted conventional behaviour. This code of conventional behaviour – never stepping outside the ‘norm’ – is programmed into us early in life and becomes more entrenched the older we get.

Judgmental people believe that everyone should live a certain way: their way. You know the type I mean, those who would never dare to do something outside their own narrow rigid parameters or take a risk and tut when someone else does. These people are too scared to try something different. Their disapproval disguises what they really feel: resentful and envious.

If the person fails, these judgemental people can happily say, “There, I told you so” in confirmation that their way is right. If the person succeeds, the judgemental person labels them lucky.

Some years ago there was an advert that illustrated this disapproval of stepping outside the norm beautifully. People were peeking from behind their net curtains outraged to discover that some people actually ate breakfast cereal at night! Now this is an inconsequential, funny example, but it is indicative of what I’m talking about.

Has ‘should’ shaped your life?

Did your parents ever say, ‘What would the neighbours think?’ These people are those neighbours. I call them ‘lemon-sucking curtain-twitchers’. They’re people who like nothing better than passing comment on what other people do and how others live their life.

Maybe we ought to feel sorry for them; they obviously haven’t got a life of their own or they wouldn’t spend so much time gossiping about others. One thing we definitely ought to do is ignore them.

Let Yourself Go

Do you long to be able to dance and give yourself up to the music the way you do in the privacy of your own home, but can’t let yourself go in public because you’re embarrassed by what others might think of you?

Is fear stopping you from doing bigger things in your life?

• Do you envy people who ‘have a go’ and long to do the same?
• Do you want to do something, but worry it may not work out?

You need to learn to differentiate between times when you’re right to be cautious and when your fears are unfounded. Here's a trick I learned.

Anticipated versus Actual

Take a look back at things that have happened in the past.

• Do you remember what you thought would happen?
• And do you remember what actually happened?

I’m betting they were often two very different scenarios.

The next time you’re faced with a decision of whether or not to do something, ask yourself if your resistance to doing it is due to a genuine need to be cautious or just your fear of doing something different.

In summary, the only person who can stop you doing all the things you want to is you. And the only thing that can stop you is your fear.

So why not step outside your comfort zone and make the decision to do something you’ve always wanted to do?

Apart from your fear, what’s stopping you?

“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”n- Franklin D Roosevelt