XYZ Company, Will You Go Out With Me?
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I have always found it easy to view the employee/employer relationship similar to a dating relationship. People put up with things from their employers that they would never tolerate from their partners.
There is one key difference, you say. Your main source of income is not your spouse or boy/girlfriend. He or she does not pay for the majority of your health insurance like a typical employer does. But how is someone who is hanging on to his hellish job simply because it pays the mortgage any different from someone who stays in a relationship only because his house constantly looks like a page out of a Williams Sonoma catalog? In both cases, something is clearly wrong…but the person is unwilling or unable to make the change(s) necessary to correct the situation!
I am sure you have heard the job interview is as much for you as it is for the employer. Sounds good, right? But how many people approach an interview with this in mind? Usually all we can think about is how we wish we could relax! Most of us go into a job interview hoping the employer will like us and eventually hire us. In other words, we tend to not approach the situation with the attitude of an equal. Even a slight lack of confidence will cause you to see the employer as above you or more powerful than you. At that point, it’s all about the employer. What about you? What do you want in an employer? In a career? You would never approach a relationship this way!
When you think of an interview as an opportunity to interview the employer and evaluate it as your potential employer, your confidence increases a little, doesn’t it? You start to find the confidence to ask important questions, which makes you appear interested, which is attractive to an employer. This sounds like a cycle I can live with!
But, you say, when money is involved, everything changes. Does it? If you truly need a job to pay the bills until you establish your criteria for a career, my advice is to visit a staffing agency. No, these are not dream jobs, but…they pay the bills.
Once money is no longer an immediate issue, you can focus on determining exactly what you want. Do not interview just to interview. Few things make me cringe more than when I hear someone say, “I’ll take any job.” You would not waste your time in a relationship with someone you see no future with, correct?
Your Bad Attitude Does Not Attract Success!
When I am in a bad mood, no one can talk me down from it. Sound familiar? Like my husband says, “blowing sunshine up your butt” only makes you more upset. However, even if you do not believe in karma, you know that being nice to people pays dividends. And when you are obviously in a bad mood, at best you will not attract friends, and at worst you will end up in the elevator with a happy delivery guy you just want to choke!
As a career coach, one of the best things I can do to build my business is establish relationships. I do this by going out and meeting people in line in coffee shops, in discussion groups, and anywhere people come together. You are no different. Being approachable and reaching out to people may be difficult when things are not turning out the way you planned, but I dare you to do it anyway. Focus on someone else’s challenges, and you may drastically change the direction your day is going. You might pick up a friend, a customer or even a business partner!
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