Marcia Naomi Berger
MSW, LCSW
Free
Author, Therapist, Marriage and Relationships Expert
Marcia Naomi Berger Quick Facts
- Main Areas
- Marriage and Relationshps
- Best Sellers
- Marriage Meetings for Lasting Love: 30 Minutes a Week to the Relationship You've Always Wanted (Author of Marriage Meetings for Lasting Love: 30 Minutes a Week to the Relationship You've Always Wanted (New World Library).
- Career Focus
- Author, Speaker, Psythotherapist
- Affiliation
- National Association of Social Workers (NASW)
Marcia Naomi Berger. LCSW, is the author of MARRIAGE MINDED: An A to Z Dating Guide for Lasting Love (She Writes Press, 2021, and of MARRIAGE MEETINGS FOR LASTING LOVE: 30 Minutes a Week to the Relationship You’ve Always Wanted (New World Library). A licensed clinical social worker and psychotherapist in San Rafael, Califo ia, she leads marriage and communications workshops for the public (Marry With Confidence workshops and Marriage Meeting workshops) and communications seminars at corporations. She has been teaching continuing education programs for therapists for the National Association of Social Workers, and at the UC Berkeley Extension and Alliant International University.
A former executive director of Jewish Family and Children’s Services of the East Bay and clinical faculty member at the UCSF School of Medicine, she has held senior level positions in the fields of child welfare, alcoholism treatment, and psychiatry. She earned her master’s degree in social work at the University of Michigan.
Free Audio & Video Samples
Marcia Naomi Berger Books
Marriage Minded: An A to Z Dating Guide for Lasting Love
https://www.amazon.com/Marriage-Minded-Dating-Guide-Lasting/dp/1647421799/ref=sr_1_3?crid=3O0L8NNXGS0CR&keywords=marriage+minded+an+a+to+z+dating+guide+for+lasting+love&qid=1644011507&s=books&sprefix=marriage+minded%2Cstripbooks%2C203&sr=1-3
Marriage Meetings for Lasting Love: 30 Minutes a Week to the Relationship You've Always Wanted
http://www.amazon.com/Marriage-Meetings-Lasting-Love-Relationship/dp/1608682234
Articles by this expert
SelfGrowth articles and saved writing connected to this expert.
Article
Marriage -- Are You Having Fun Yet?
Have you heard that marriage can get boring? This doesn’t need to happen, but it can feel ho-hum when things have gotten way too predictable. Routines are important, but this doesn’t mean that the thrills have to end, By trying out activities that are different from your usual ones, you’ll enjoy the comfort of some routines and also stay enjoy enough stimulation to keep you thriving. Zest is Contagious
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Self-talk Saves Marriage, Other Relationships
People don't just get upset. They contribute to their upsetness. -- Albert Ellis Maybe you've heard the joke that talking to yourself is the first sign of madness. Actually, the good kind of self-talk can actually save your marriage and other relationships. For a good marriage, who do you think is the most important person with whom you should communicate well? If you think it's your spouse, think again.
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Did You Know Marrying Takes Leap of Faith?
Many singles are conflicted about marrying. They yearn for the fulfillment a good marriage brings but are afraid to commit. They fear it won't work out, which given the current high rate of marriage failures, is understandable. It should come as no surprise that it takes a leap of faith to marry. The example below shows how one woman resolved her conflict about marrying. Her major challenges were learning to believe in herself and gaining trust that she could succeed. How to Gain Faith
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"The Boys in the Boat" and Marriage
What does the immensely popular book, "The Boys in the Boat" have to do with marriage? Hint: Ask yourself what you think a great marriage looks like? Spouses enjoying being together, basically in harmony for a lifetime? Or does "happily married" sound to you like an impossible dream? Cynicism about marriage is common these days. Fairy tales that finish with "and they lived happily ever after" don't mention a key ingredient in marriage. Nor do novels and movies give credence to the importance of this element: Teamwork. Roles of Spouses No Longer Fixed
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Can My Marriage Withstand Lingering Conflict?
Many people think that if a marriage is basically healthy all issues get resolved. Yet according to psychologist and author John Gottman's groundbreaking research, a whopping 69 percent of problems in marriage do not get solved.[1] His good news, though, is that many problems can be managed. Gottman states that couples can live with unresolvable conflicts about perpetual issues in their relationship if the issues are not deal breakers.
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How Important is Chemistry in Relationships?
When it comes to a potentially romantic relationship, chemistry is a loaded word. Does one of these beliefs pop into your mind when you hear it? • For a good relationship, chemistry needs to be there right away. • Chemistry might not be felt initially but can develop later. • Love at first sight, or a variation of this, predicts a good long term relationship. • Chemistry can come and go, depending on other factors. • Chemistry is not essential for a good marriage. • Chemistry can attract you to the "wrong" person.
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Ouch! My Mate Touched a Nerve...
If you're in a close relationship, sometimes your partner is likely to say something that jars you. Maybe you feel tightness in your throat, chest or elsewhere, You might forget to breather. Do you change the subject? Call her or him selfish, unreasonable, or inconsiderate? Or withdraw? Reacting means doing or saying what first pops into your mind. If you routinely do whatever you’re asked to do when you’d rather not, you’re likely to build up resentment. If instead of yielding, you belittle or stonewall your partner, you can expect ill will and conflict to increase.
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Marriage Counselor Confesses Own Foibles
Hero worship makes me uncomfortable. I am an extremely minor public figure, except among certain family members and friends who inflate my fame as author of Marriage Meetings for Lasting Love. As a marriage expert, I sense that many people who have heard of me think I must be a perfect marriage partner. This is not true. I'm no hero.
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Can Good Marriages Have Unresolved Conflicts?
Even in the best marriages, not all conflicts get resolved. According to psychologist John Gottman’s research, 69 percent of problems in marriage do not get solved.[1] His good news is that in good marriages many perpetual issues that are not deal breakers can be managed. It's not the presence of conflict that stresses the relationship; it is the manner in which the couple responds. Positive, respectful communication about differences helps keep a marriage thriving.
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What's Wrong with Saying "No Problem?"
Saying "thank you" is gracious. These are two words we all like to hear. How do you respond to someone who thanks you? This common replay makes me cringe: "No Problem!" "No problem." "No worries." We hear these words from sales clerks, food servers, and others after we thank them for doing their job. Also from friends, family members, and acquaintances. What's wrong with this? The unconscious does not recognize a negative
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Should You Ever Criticize Your Spouse?
"A love without reproof is no love." ---Rabbi Yosi ben Chanina Reproof is defined as rebuke or criticism. You may feel safer by seething silently when irked by a potential or actual marriage partner's behavior. But sometimes speaking up, with kindness and respect, at a time when both of you are calm, is the best thing to do. Keeping a grievance inside can result in distancing behaviors and grudge holding. Calmly bringing up a matter you find disconcerting, can clear the air and renew good feelings that cease when knots are tying up your insides.
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Do You Listen to Convince--or to Learn?
"When you talk you are only repeating what you already know. But when you listen you might learn something new" --attributed alte ately to the Dalai Lama and author J.P. McEvoy. "Are you a convincer or a listener?" asks Melissa Orlov, author of The ADHD Effect on Marriage. I mention this because I like the term she uses: convincer.
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Other highlights
Marry With Confidence Workshops for Women
Marriage Meeting Workshops for Couples
Individual and Couple Therapy sessions