5 Tips for Good Relationships

Love is easy - relationships can be hard. We’re all individuals that come from different backgrounds, parenting and environments. Yet, with all of these differences we hope to come together in search of good friendships and romantic relationships. No problem, right? ;) As a love coach and Reiki Master, I’ve observed a few things that keep us from the party.

‘Blame’ is one of the biggest chasms between us and attracting the healthy relationship that we seek. It’s far easier to say that others are at fault for not attracting a relationship, or for one not working out. “There are no men in this town!” Not. Ever. True.

For the most part, we are responsible for the condition that we’re in - no blame. You are the captain of your ship. Therefore, be self-reflective. This is my first tip.

Be open to change because life doesn’t stay the same, so we must move with it. I’m not suggesting you change your personality, but I am suggesting that you be amenable to trying different approaches in the areas where something has not been successful. Often I see clients unhappy in platonic and romantic relationships but they keep doing the same things to make them right, hoping that the other individual will get a clue.

Listen. This is a lost art for some. I had a conversation with a woman the other day and I was telling a story. However, her main goal was to answer all of my thoughts before I completed them, as I was telling my story. It became a virtual psychotic guessing game of sorts. I could barely finish a sentence. Eventually I softly said, “Let me finish.” She did. We can’t listen if we’re talking. And furthermore, listen with your ears and your heart. This is one of the kindest things you can do for another. If you’re really paying attention you can glean what’s really going on with your loved one without them saying a word.

Love people. Are you someone that says, “I don’t like people”? You are a person. What we say about others we’re in effect saying to the Universe, “I’d like that said or done to me too."

Relax and be patient. Anxiety can ruin a relationship. Take your time with friends, as well as strangers. My local supermarket has an elevator which takes us down to the parking garage. Many times the folks getting on don’t wait for the ones getting off. It can get very awkward and rude. Take a breath and slow down. This is another benefit of meditation and reiki. It makes you engage in the practice of mindfulness. Take your time with your mate and when looking for love. But most importantly, be patient with yourself.