Money-Smart Kids: Greed

Chocolate hearts and Valentine messages soften the gray and cold of deep winter–opening up the heart in this icy season. This year, use winter’s little crack for the unexpected: Tackle greed.

Greed reveals itself in a child’s reluctance to share, and adults’ willingness to risk all in the pursuit of more. Theories about its origin range from the psychological (unsatisfied infant neediness) to the economic (a competitive drive for “betterment” or status). But origin is not destiny, and reviews of the literature show no positive connection between greed and happiness.

Greed has become so ingrained in the culture that it now seems inevitable, or normal. We walk around it, accept it, feel disgust in its presence, only rarely addressing it directly. But when adults are silent, children are vulnerable to cultural messages that implicitly encourage greed with no counterbalancing force. (i.e., it’s all about me; take what you can get; more, bigger, faster; win at any cost, etc…) Kids often interpret adult silence as tacit approval–or at least passive tolerance–leaving greed, as a character trait, to grow like weeds unchecked.

Using Valentine’s Day in an unexpected way makes it more memorable. Start the day by framing the subject in a new way. Ask or do the following:
• “If greed were a color, what might it be? Why?” Suggest they share what they think before they go to bedn • Ask them to recall acts of generosity and of greed among their friends, describing their reactions to each.
• Share something you view as your own greedy behavior–and how you now feel about it.
• Ask how we know the difference between wanting something really badly–and greed.
• Send grandchildren cards with the message that Valentine’s Day is a great day for exercising generosity and kindness. Make an Anti-Greed Oath with your 12-year-old. Offer to remind one another when greed makes an appearance. Read the paper together, circling in red those acts of generosity, and circling in green the examples of greed. Give a donation to his or her favorite cause; labeling it your Valentine’s Day Vanquishing Greed Campaign.

Grownups must name greed, making it–and your disapproval–visible. However sanctimonious you may sound as an adult, your voice is still a powerful way to help children develop character–and financial fitness.

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