Be the Butterfly

Over the past two years, I’ve used various activities to cope with my divorce: yoga, meditation, coffee dates with friends, workshops and the OJC retreat, etc. One simple, yet effective coping mechanism has been inspirational quotes taped to my bathroom mirror. They change periodically depending on my current state of mind and emotions. The first themes were attempts to stay positive in the face of all the changes and struggles. The quotes were reminders that when things felt out of control around me, I still had control over my attitude and actions. Recently I stumbled across this quotation on a magnet. It hit home so profoundly, capturing the past two years of my life in its thirteen words: “Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly.”- Proverb The first year of my separation, I was an energetic worldwind. Manic energy propelled me through my days. I was crazed and determined to accomplish tasks and ready myself for what was to come. I resembled the Hungry Caterpillar- consuming everything in my path with a resolve to keep on going no matter what stomachaches came my way. Then this winter hit and I cocooned. My energy abated and I longed to wrap myself in my new fleece sheets and stay warm. And without my good sense of responsibility (and two young children), I probably would have hidden away. Safe, cozy and comfortable. Alone and stuck. Yet, over the past few weeks, I’ve felt the itch. The desire to socialize and meet new people (perhaps of the opposite sex?). To learn and move and feel the sun on my face. Yes, as clichéd as it is, to spread my wings and fly. Ironically, butterflies have always been my thing. I love their metamorphosis and message that change can be beautiful. And they are a perfect reminder that even when things look their darkest, something even more wonderful may be right around the corner. So if you’re in the midst of a life change or a chapter in your life is coming to a close, do not fear the next step. Allow yourself the necessary moments to refuel and recharge, but remember that life is not over. Another, more beautiful and freeing opportunity is just around the corner.