Break Through Unwanted Patterns

There are times when life is on a roll, when everything happens effortlessly and seems to fall in place. We feel great and couldn’t have been more happier. It’s as if the planets and stars were aligned just for us. We even think we finally cracked the success formula. Isn’t life just wonderful? Yippee!

Then there are those times when no matter what we do, nothing seems to go right. It’s like pushing a boulder uphill. It takes more effort than we imagined, our energy is drained, and we are stressed out and frustrated. Why does life has to be such a struggle, one after the other? Sigh! Sigh!

Some people think it’s because of fate that they don’t have what they desire. They believe their lives are meant to be that way for some unfathomable reason. Many others disagree with the notion of fate as it negates free will or choice and responsibility.

So, how much control do we really have in shaping our lives?

Our thoughts translate to emotions. Together they affect our actions. Our actions determine the results and what we experience. Our experience influences our beliefs and perceptions. Our beliefs and perceptions program our thoughts. Thus are born habits and default tendencies that either contribute to our success or lack thereof. So, either we have the SUCCESS FORMULA or the VICIOUS CYCLE. Like a whirlpool, the latter can suck us in and toss us all over till we can barely think straight or recognize what is happening to us.

Let us look at an example. Sue is a small business owner and is unhappy with her clients. Her clients are either complaining or making unreasonable demands. “Does my client want me to read his/her mind? They tell us to get something done, but they really only want it done their way.” She desires to be a true partner to her clients but fears she’ll never have the opportunity to be one as she finds herself getting the same kind of client over and over again.

It is normal for her to believe that way because of her repeated experiences. Her past experiences have created those beliefs in her and she begins to “see” her clients as complaining and demanding and eventually “expects” them to be complaining and demanding. As she becomes a “victim” to her beliefs, she emits “victim” energy and attracts clients whose energy fulfills those beliefs and expectations: clients who are complaining and demanding. And thus, she unknowingly plays a role in creating her future client relationships and experiences and will continue to do so unless she breaks through the vicious cycle that we were talking of before.

Identify a situation in your life that has been a challenge for some time. What beliefs and expectations do you have regarding this? What could you change to break the VICIOUS CYCLE?