Dad’s Powerful Influence

An abundance of research in the past 10 years has shown repeatedly that involved fathers play a vital role in the well being of their children. Studies have confirmed that fathers have a distinct, necessary and irreplaceable role to play in child development. Fathers bring a quality to parenting that is different than mothers, and children benefit greatly from both styles. Dads and moms are not interchangeable.

Unfortunately, many children in our society today do not reap the benefits of an involved father. Over one-third of our nation’s children live without their biological fathers. Twenty-eight percent of children live in single-parent homes (usually with the mother, although this is changing slowly), up from nine percent in 1960. The number of children living with never-married mothers has virtually exploded, from 221,000 in 1960 to 5,862,000 in 1995. These statistics are sobering enough, yet there are unknown numbers of children who lives in homes where their fathers are present, but physically or emotionally unavailable to them. Dad’s unavailability was the norm for many fathers, and mothers, who are raising their own children today.

An extremely high divorce rate and the increasing number of children being born out of wedlock are two major contributors to this dramatic phenomenon in recent times. In 1995, the number of currently divorced people in the United States was four times higher than in 1970. In 1974, one-third of all newbo
s was born to an unmarried mother.

The National Fatherhood Initiative (NFI) compiled statistics that underline, and bold, the consequences for children who grow up without the benefit of a caring and involved father. The consequences impact us all. NFI compiled sobering data that indicates nationally, 60 percent of rapists, 72 percent of adolescent murderers, and 70 percent of long-term inmates come from fatherless homes. Additionally, children without fathers are:
• Two to three times as likely to have emotional and behavioral problems (USDHHS health survey)
• More likely to have illnesses and physical problems
• More likely to commit suicide
• Three to five times as likely to be involved in out-of-wedlock pregnancy
• Fifty percent more likely to drop out of school, use drugs and alcohol, join gangs, and commit crimes.

The research is also in on the benefits of a father’s involvement with his children.

• Father-child interaction has been shown to promote a child’s physical well-being,
perceptual abilities, and competency for relatedness with others, even at a young age
• Longitudinal studies have found that children who have a strong attachment and
are consistently involved with their fathers have better self-esteem, a greater sense of competence, and better intellectual development and academic success
* In a 26-year longitudinal study on 379 individuals, researchers found that the single most important childhood factor in developing empathy is pate
al involvement. Fathers who spent time alone with their children performing routine childcare at least two times a week, raised children who were the most compassionate adults. It’s becoming apparent how the development of empathy, clear values, and the ability to inhibit aggression are highly correlated to father involvement.

In 1997, an U.S. Department of Education study reported the stunning impact fathers have on a child’s academic performance and behavioral conduct. The study compared highly involved fathers in two parent households and fathers in single parent homes, while trying to control for the mother’s level of involvement. A highly involved father was defined as one who attended three or more school activities during a school year. The study did not report on a father’s attitudes towards education, or his involvement in homework, or his interest in what his children learned that day in school. The school activities that were noted in this study were things like attending school meetings, parent teacher conferences, or some other class event (i.e., field trip, class play, etc.)

Following are some of the results of this study:
• In two parent homes with a highly involved father, the children were more likely
to enjoy school, earn mostly A’s, and participate in extra-curricular activities like sports or clubs
• In father-only families, a highly involved father again increased the probability of
his children getting mostly A’s, and reduced his children’s chances of being suspended or expelled.
• Even a highly involved father who didn’t live with his children reduced the
likelihood of conduct problems that would lead to expulsion, and the chances his children would need to repeat a grade

Again the research points to a father’s presence as a powerful influence on his children’s development academically and socially, and also contributes to improved self esteem and drug abuse resistance. In our increasingly high-tech information age, success and enjoyment of education are crucial gifts to our children.

Much of this recent research helps clarify not only the importance of a father’s positive presence and influence, but also the means to achieve it. If a father’s presence at school activities three times a year makes such a significant difference, one can imagine the positive changes that might occur if he attended more, or even volunteered in his child’s classroom. What if dad’s attitude was highly supportive of education throughout the life span? What would daily involvement with homework do? Imagine dad asking questions over the dinner table regarding what their children learned today at school.

There is more and more research showing how important a relationship with dear old dad just is!

Randy Mergler, M.S., LMFT
www.limitlessliving.org