Demi Moore Is doing Divorce Right! And Her Children Are Reaping The Benefits.

Today’s Hollywood is rarely a place to find role models for our culture, especially when it comes to divorce and family issues. Year after year we’ve been exposed to dramatic, painful, explosive relationship breakups resulting in tabloid headlines that feed upon scandal and exploitation.

In a society that worships the rich and famous, this type of circus behavior only serves to reinforce the impression that divorce has to be dirty, destructive and demoralizing for all conce
ed. Throw an antiquated group of hungry divorce atto
eys into the mix – the ones who live for litigation and thrive on aggravating acrimony – and you have a volatile brew destined for disaster.

Fortunately there are exceptions. Not every celebrity is modeling insanity in their relationships. Not every celebrity family is suffering from the emotional and psychological scars that inevitably result when both parents are fighting like pit-bulls, trying to tear each other apart while their children look on helplessly.

One of my favorite examples of divorce done right is Demi Moore and Bruce Willis. These parents take co-parenting seriously and have created a harmonious long-term example of what I call, Child-Centered Divorce. It takes two mature, sane and civilized adults to create a child-centered divorce, but when you consider how insane the alte
ative is, the peaceful route is the only direction to take. You benefit in many positive ways. Your former spouse benefits, as well. And, most important of all, your children are the real winners! They enjoy a healthy relationship with both of the parents they love and want to continue to love without pressure or guilt.

When recently interviewed about how she manages to maintain a friendship and healthy co-parenting relationship with Bruce Willis, Demi said: “Look, I’m the product of divorced parents, and my brother and I were the pawns in my parent’s game. I never wanted that for my kids. At that time, I could not have seen what a gift that situation was, but without that experience, I would not have known there was a different choice to make in my own divorce.”

Bavo, Demi! The key word here is CHOICE. Every parent in a divorce situation has a choice in how they will behave in relation to their ex, their children and the entire family unit. It’s your choice whether you play mind games, foster resentment, express your anger, vent in front of your children, turn sons and daughters into confidents, alienate your children against their other parent and a host of other behaviors destined to create emotional havoc in your children’s lives.
Demi got it right. She learned through her own painful life experience as a child of divorce – and as a pawn of her parents – how it feels to be caught up in the hostilities festering betwee
Mom and Dad. She knew she didn’t want to subject her children to a hurt that lasts a lifetime – and vowed to take a different course. I love that she recognizes this wisdom as a gift. She used her own personal pain as a catalyst for making better choices for her own children. How fortunate they are! And what a wonderful gift her model is for us all.

Hats off to Demi Moore and Bruce Willis! It may not always be easy, or simple, but it’s always worth it. Just ask your children!