Does it Feel a Little too Close to Home?

I am recouping from my busy weekend with family. We had a wonderful time celebrating our parent’s 50th anniversary and everyone made it home. My mother enjoyed every picture taking minute of our time together. It is tough to get all 25+ of us together at one time, so she took as many as she wished. After all, it was her day so we complied. Many great memories we talked and laughed about, while making more. For a few weeks now, I have been thinking about a few responses I have had about my first workbook. To some people, this book hits a little too close to home. What I mean by this is how frightening it is to look in the mirror of self, so I want to talk more about this with everyone. My hopes are to support the people who are having trouble working on their inner voice and the core of self. You are NOT alone! It is scary to start a journey of looking within, especially when life has been so busy that you have been put on the back burner. Countless people have walked this scary journey with their inner voice and found it worth every anxiety-filled minute! They would do it again. That is part of working on our self-esteem; we keep striving for better. The negative voice happens slowly over time, and unknowingly in some ways. Yes, I remember too well so you are never alone on this! One of my hopes when writing this book was to support the person who is too scared of looking within and can’t quite verbalize this yet. When any sort of self-discovery journey begins for anyone, you can panic because you do not know what you will see on the inside. I remember this very well in rehab many years ago. I remember saying to myself over and over, “What if I am rotten to the core?” or “What if I am not as good as I hope I am.” And, “What if I just don’t like what I see!” Have you ever found the inner voice mumbling: * I do not deserve this honor * I am not good enough to make more money * I just have to accept that some people have a life where nothing works out right. * I do not feel like I am deserving * I am not smart enough to go to college * 50% of all marriages end in divorce, so I need to just suck it up and stay. I brought this on myself. ** I bet you could go on and on here.... This makes me so sad looking back at myself as a young girl in treatment and when I hear clients say such things. I know it was my experiences, and I am so grateful I continued on my life of taking care of me. What a terrible place to be, but it doesn't have to be permanent! Most of my clients experience this as well. I will never forget where I came from with the doom-filled inner voice. I got through it and no longer feel this way. You can too! I am not perfect and still have tough days, but my feelings and fears are not this deep any longer, so this is your pocket of hope. So this is my olive branch to those of you who are a bit apprehensive to looking within for the first time. Remember, your soul is good, kind, and caring. The bad stuff on top of it is life’s happenings and we are going to do some housecleaning. If you feel the need for one on one guidance, this is the perfect time to invest in a personal coach or counselor. They offer you the strongest unbiased support and tools to a strong inner core. The two go hand in hand and true change happens when both areas have the same attention. Then your life will be like ripples in a pond. It has these strong, loving vibes that affect the rest of your life when your core is healing and stronger. Remember, a good coach will never judge you and the investment in yourself is so worth it! Be well, Merna Copyright © 2008 Merna Throne. All rights reserved.