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The Question Freud Couldn't Answer

Topic: Adult and Senior DevelopmentBy Susan Dunn, MA Psychology, The EQ CoachPublished Recently added

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Have you received “King Arthur’s Dilemma: A Wise Lesson for All Men to Learn” in your email? (I have no idea to whom to attribute it.)

Here’s how it goes: As a test, young Arthur was asked to answer the question, “What do women really want?” (Freud’s ete
al question.) He finally went to “a repugnant old witch” to get the answer. She said she’d tell him if he’d marry her. He agreed and she gave the answer: “To be in charge of their own life.”

Then the wedding … and Arthur was v. reluctant. But, this being a fairytale, there was more testing of our hero ahead. She appeared to him as beautiful woman saying that since he’d been so kind to her, she’d be a witch half the time, and a beautiful maiden half the time. But he would have to choose when!

He pondered … a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at night, in the privacy of his home, an old witch? Or by day a hideous hag, but by night a beautiful woman with whom to enjoy many intimate moments?

The fable continues: “Noble Arthur replied he would let her choose for herself. Upon hearing this, she announced she would be beautiful all the time, because he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of her own life.”

This came to me at an interesting time, having just finished reading "Surrendered Wife"(a http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0743204441/susandunnmome-20 ), by Laura Doyle, and also a synopsis of “Men are from Mars” ( http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/006016848/susandunnmome-20 )about what MEN really want. John Gray, author of the latter, reiterates, “Men and woman have very different primary needs.” Men, he says, need appreciation, acceptance, and trust. He goes on to say “Without appreciation, a person begins to feel inadequate and incapable of giving support.” Funny he switches to “person” here. An unappreciated man, he says, becomes “passive, lazy, weak, dependent, insecure and apt to procrastinate.”

But then so do I. Actually, I get ugly.

My answer to Freud’s question “What do women want?” has always been “The same thing men want.”

Laura Doyle says men need to be asked, "What do you think?"

That's how I'll end this article: What do YOU think women want? Male or female, didn't you appreciate being asked??

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