For The Love Of Money: The Truth About Financial Infidelity

Financial infidelity, you may not know about it, but you may guilty of it. Financial infidelity is every bit as damaging to the relationship as the physical one. As one husband says, “It’s one thing to fool around. It’s another thing to fool around with my hard-earned cash.”

When money collides with marriage, all forms of lies occur- white lies, small lies, big lies. And once you are guilty of lying about money matters to your partner, you are guilty of financial infidelity. Financial infidelity is when you cease to be transparent about your finances to your partner. It is when you conceal your financial status to your spouse.

For instance, a small lie is when you bought something and told your spouse that you got it on sale when you didn’t.

A white lie is telling your love
that you are going to visit your sick aunt, but actually spend your whole day in an expensive spa treatment. While concealing a five-figure credit card debt is definitely a big lie.

You can sometimes let go of the small and white lies, but a big lie can come as unforgivable. Not when your life’s savings and your children’s college fund are at risk because of impulsive spending. But still many of us find it hard to be transparent and truthful to our partner when money’s involved.

One great example is my friend, Jean, she works as a real estate broker.

When she got a $30,000 bonus for making a great deal, she never told her husband about it. Her reason for not putting it in their joint account: “My husband is overly generous with his friends. He treats his friends like there’s no tomorrow and never let them pay the tab. It’s irritating!” Then there’s Tracy who confessed in sneaking “a $20 here and there” while paying the bills and uses it to buy something frivolous without telling her husband. And Tom hid his purchases from his wife to avoid arguing about money.

Financial infidelity occurs when one partner thinks it’s foolish to spend money on certain things, while the other partner thinks, “why not!” How to deal with infidelity, in this case, financial infidelity is to discuss about spending limits and creating allowances. Personal and financial freedom is important that is why deciding to have a “slush fund” can cut down conflicts and unnecessary expenses.

You see, like all types of infidelity, communication is the only practical solution.