GIVING / RECEIVING

Working in the healing industry tends to draw compassionate, caring people as practitioners. Although this is ideally what clients / patients want from health professionals like counsellors, naturopaths, social workers, hypnotherapists, psychologists and so on, the common problem is that such practitioners usually are so busy giving to their clients that they forget to give back to themselves or have closed themselves off from receiving as much as they should energetically to remain energetically balanced. If the two sides of the giving/receiving equation are not balanced, the result is physical and emotional burnout. The average time in the healing industry before complete burnout is 8 years. I’ve been in this industry since 1995 and have had a few rocky patches where my energy levels were getting very low from giving out far more than I was receiving back, so I have learnt to recognise the signs of impending burnout by trial and error. We don’t need to necessarily receive back from the same person the same amount of energy we give to them, although this is the ideal wherever possible. If you are in professional practice you should ensure your fees cover your perceived energy expenditure.

Basically, in order to stay physically and emotionally healthy we must balance out what we give out energetically with what we receive back.

I have used the example of health care practitioners, but mothers, wives, in fact females in general are often giving out far more than they receive. The result? A build-up of resentment, frustration, low tolerance to stress, exhaustion, victim-mentality, martyr-mentality, ‘when will it be my turn’ mentality and just plain angry outbursts. Can you relate to any of these?

Sometimes we need to make substantial lifestyle changes to get away from this trap, such as letting go of a relationship or friend that just continually drains us energetically. I affectionately call such people, ‘energy vampires’, although most of them are not consciously aware of trying to drain our energy. They do it at subtle levels just because our energy fields allow it. If your job just feels as if it is draining the very life-blood out of you, then you may seriously need to consider changing jobs or even careers.

Many of us have low self-worth and almost feel duty-bound to keep on giving out relentlessly to justify our existence without feeling worthy of receiving anything back in return. Wrong! We all contain a divine spark within us that unites us together as equal parts of creation. We are never separate or inferior. Separation is the illusion we have to give ourselves a hard time. Stop viewing yourself as inferior to, or better than someone else - we are all just souls who have chosen different bodies this lifetime in which to learn spiritual lessons.

It is essential we are comfortable receiving from others and especially receiving from ourselves, as this is an expression of self-love. Many times others are offering us love or potential happiness, but our hearts are closed to receiving it or we feel we are not valuable enough to receive it. Think for a moment if there are any situations in your life where you are closed to or blocking receiving the goodness being offered to you. It may be something simple like a neighbour offering to help with the gardening or more dramatic like a marriage proposal from a really decent person.

How do you support yourself to make up any energetic deficits in your life? Maybe you could give yourself a special present or treat, like a relaxation massage, a weekend escape or dinner with a special friend? Being in nature is one of the best ways of clearing negative energy from yourself and of receiving the beauty of nature with all your senses. Standing in full sun for a few minutes is also a marvellous quick energetic pick-me-up.

Most of us don’t have any trouble in giving, but if you realise you have trouble in receiving, then it is essential you address your underlying issues of low self-worth and the value you place on what you give out on a daily basis.