How to Survive being Single during the Holidays!

The Holidays are upon us, which means that we can expect to spend more time than usual with our loved ones. Many will travel to see family members and/or friends. This may prove difficult for those singles who are recently separated or divorced; those who have younger, married siblings with children; or those who have judgmental family members. Moreover, lacking a significant other may dampen the spirit of the season for singles. My relationship advice for being single during the holidays is to proactively prepare for the Holidays by focusing on and doing the things that will allow you to appreciate and enjoy the season.

• Do What You Enjoyr
When there’s no significant other to consider, you can decide for yourself how, where and with whom you want to spend your Holidays. You don’t have any In Laws competing for your time, so you can make more time for your family and your friends. My relationship advice for being single during the holidays is that you see this as the huge advantage that it is and really enjoy the choices you have. You don’t have to worry about someone else’s loved ones, which means more time for being with your loved ones.

If you enjoy traveling, take a trip! You don’t need to make sure that your boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife will appreciate and enjoy your desired destination – the only person who needs to like it is you. You can visit an old friend who would appreciate spending time with you. Or take a cruise with other singles.

During the Holiday Season many of us shop for gifts fro our family and friends and it often becomes tedious. If you enjoy shopping, make sure you take time to enjoy the bargain shopping available this time of year. You can search around for that jacket or gadget you’ve been wanting and use the money that you would have spent on a significant other or his/her family members and buy something for yourself.

• Nip Negativity in the Budr
One of my clients jokingly told me that he wished he could hire an escort to take home for the Holidays so that he wouldn’t have to deal with the constant questioning about being single. Obviously he didn’t really want to resort to this, however, anticipating the pitying remarks that often come from well meaning family members are difficult to take for some singles.

Remarks like, “you’re so handsome, you will meet someone” or, “you’re such a nice girl, you have so much to offer” may come from a place of love, but often come across as patronizing. My relationship advice is to proactively counteract such remarks. Let your family members know that they upset you and ask that they not make them, especially in front of the other family members. Your family members probably do not realize that such comments can be hurtful and will avoid the topic once they realize you are bothered by them. Once they have been made aware, you’ll be able to better enjoy the spirit of the season and your time with your family.

My ultimate relationship advice for being singles during the holidays is to keep the spirit of the season in mind. Rather than focusing on what you don’t have or settling for less than what you want and deserve, be appreciative and grateful for what you do have in your life. If you can hold on to that, the Holidays will be an enjoyable time for you.