It's OK to Get Sick With Jealousy (As Long As You Learn From It)
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Do you ever experience jealousy of others? It's okay, you can admit - I do too. All the freaking time - especially when I'm frustrated or too mired in procrastination to do anything worthwhile myself.
In fact, I've been jealous many times.
A couple of years ago, I was working in a corporate job dreaming about being free to do whatever I wanted.
And then... two friends were made redundant from their jobs.
When you're made redundant in your twenties from a job you hate, it's FREAKING AWESOME. One friend got a 6 month payout, the other got 18 months tax free salary!
I was insane with jealousy. I HATED going to work every day. Why couldn't someone make me redundant (believe me, I would have packed up my stuff in ten minutes!).
I kept asking "Why can't someone pay me to go off and decide what I want to do". I thought it was incredibly unfair and I was so jealous.
Eventually I realised these feelings of resentment weren't really serving me. So I decided to acknowledged it and my new affirmation became "It's okay, good things are happening for me too".
It made me feel better. After all, it's natural to compare ourselves with others but I decided to wish my friends the best and feel happy for them because I knew that I deserved good things too.
Isn't it interesting that not long after, someone did pay me to go travelling for six months (but that's another story).
Let's take a closer look...
It's a huge wake up call if you're experiencing this, because as one of my mentors Ali Brown says:
If you're jealous, it's a sign that it's something you want for yourself.
So, let's look at where you're experiencing envy of others. Is it....
Career - someone else has their "dream job"
Love - you're sick of your friend and her "perfect marriage"
Money - "everyone" earns more money than you
Lifestyle - you want to cry when you go to your friend's gorgeous house
Health - shopping with your "perfect" friend is hell
Fun - look how great her life is - she has so much fun
These feelings are perfectly natural and a great sign that you're ready for some sort of transformation and upgrade of your own life.
Look at your underlying negative beliefs such as "I don't deserve it" or "I could never have that" and decide to replace them with a new affirmation. Daily goal setting and making an inspiring dream board helps you get clear on your own goals and less focused on other people's achievements.
It's unnecessary to compare yourself, you're totally 100% unique and nobody can do what you do. Be happy for your friends because the Universe is an abundant place. There is enough for everyone, especially you!
So next time you're feeling jealous, take a moment to reflect why and get clear on whatyou want. Just remember that mantra
.... good things are happening to me too.
and they will. I promise!
Denise Duffield- Thomas, Life Coach
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About the Author
Denise Duffield-Thomas is a life coach and author of The Inspired Life Formula. She helps women develop the mindset to create the personal and profession life of their dreams.
Download a free copy of her guide "The 7 Fabulous Ways to Manifest Your Wildest Dreams" at www.deniseduffieldthomas.com
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