Learn How To Love From Your Pet

As emotional humans, our life’s journey is directly (or indirectly) focused on finding connection, community and acceptance – love. As emotional beings, we are constantly trolling for that feeling we get when we connect and truly make an impression; whether it be through our performance at work, our expression as an artist, or our bond with another human in a family, friendship or romantic engagement. When you truly look at this quest and sift away the ways and means, what we are all truly looking for is acceptance and to be valued. When you think about it, that’s all it really is. We each want to be loved (accepted) for who we are in this life. So developing who we truly are should be our number one focus.

When this quest is indirectly tended to, and we spend our precious energy on self-love, self-care and self-improvement, we tend to eventually find what we are looking for in progressively more comfortable and satisfying relationships as we grow to know ourselves and learn to adeptly “choose” our best paths with others that lead to fulfillment and true companionship. On the other hand, if this effort is a daily concern, you more than likely worry about being alone and have developed a Chameleon-like personality, which allows you to conform to whatever intimate opportunities look most promising at the moment. In short, you replace your ability to choose your love partners with a healthy, fully formed self-image, with the need to impress and obtain a relationship at almost any cost. “So what”, you might say… “If you ultimately get what you want, what difference can it really make?” The cost is inescapably to your self-esteem and innate ability to adeptly choose without hesitation and with all confidence that when a new relationship possibly ends, you will be given the secret to finding what really matters to you in the next relationship. Without a fully developed love for ourselves, we are incapable of making choices that are always – 100% of the time – right for us. And don’t get me wrong, “right” doesn’t necessarily mean the perfect, never ending love. It just means what’s right for you now, at this time in your life – at this time in your learning.

Real and true love can only be found if you have first invested love into yourself. Without this personal investment, you never learn to want; you only learn to need. Want is what we learn will enhance our already meaningful and self-valued existence. Need guarantees us a bad fit that inevitably brings pain, disappointment and even self-hatred, which only perpetuates this destructive cycle.

So, the name of this article is Learn How To Love From Your Pet. Yes, I do have a reason for choosing that simplistic title. The reason is – this is so simple that even your dog or cat does it every day. They love you because you provide them with a home, food, affection and companionship – these are all the elements important to a domesticated pet. Because they have no ego, they innately know they are loved and valued and need nothing else. They don’t need to be validated or defined by you. They don’t change who they are or how they relate to you to achieve a narcissistic emotional goal. They never hold back or hesitate to show you how much you are loved and appreciated. They do not cuddle you and walk with you because they need you to love them. They cuddle and walk with you because that’s how they express their affection. They are completely whole on their own and therefore need nothing emotionally from you – except your love and acceptance.