Listening Relea ed

Everybody’s talking at me, I don’t hear a word their saying only the echoes of my mind. Is this tune reverberating for you from the early 70’s? It appears we faced lack ofnlistening skills then also. Today what comes into view is our lack of tete a tete communication. Texting, emailing,nand voice mail get the gist of the message across, but this technology is blocking out anynchance for intimacy. Relea ing how to listen can bring back the caring in communicating. Next time you areninvited to a party, consider prompting a conversation and then just listening to whatnemerges. If you listen, rather than merely hear what is being said, you engage you senses, your heart, you promote growth, and a unique experience, for yourself and others. Ponder these few listening skills 1. Consider that every person you meet is a reflection of some aspect of yourself. Explore it. Be curious. 2. Ask open ended questions that by design reveal more information. Ask the deepe question in a conversation. The question that is begging to be asked, the one thatnis the purpose of the interaction, that question that is so telling. 3. Learn to be comfortable with silence. This allows for reflection, and connectionnthat goes deeper than words. Silence creates the space for more to be revealed. Itnis perhaps better to feel, and get what the person is communicating, rather thanngathering more information by asking questions. 4. Show respect by looking into the person’s eyes. Read the facial expressions. Hea the tone of voice, is it passionate, sad, or neutrally charged. Stand at a distancenthat is appropriate and comfortable. Pay attention by providing eye contact,nlooking away demonstrates distraction. Excessive nodding is distracting, and maynbe perceived as condescending. 5. Listen for language style, is it formal, casual, funny, serious, or humorous. Beingnauthentically you, while also matching the speaker’s style, allows for better flownof communication. People more easily relate to others who relate in the samenmanner. 6. Listen for points of connection and commonality in the content of thenconversation. This is your opportunity to share something you have observed thatnmay be of value to the speaker. This builds trust and rapport. It may spark a morenpassionate chat. Keep in mind that a dialogue that is solely about you is a dialoguenof the deaf, so be generous with your attention. Make it about your audience asnmuch as it is about you. Your words engage when they are apropos. 7. Listen for what is not being said. Behaviors, or body language, often give morenclarity and insight than words. Is there a synchronicity between what is said andnwhat is being reflected? Listening with your intuition can help you relate, or it cannsignal for you the end of the interaction. Is what you see what you get, or is therenan elephant in the room? There is no value in listening to false truths. 8. Clarifying what you hear is essential to good listening skills. Repeating back anphrase, or thought, shows that you have pledged your attention, and also that youncare enough to understand it correctly. It gives the speaker space to rethink thenthought, or rephrase it, and often times brings greater meaning to the interaction. It is this dance, between the speaker and the listener, that can lead to a deepe connection and a mutual win/win. 9. Turn off those echoes in your mind and you will find that options to navigate thenconversation will flow more naturally. Everyone has something to offer you ifnyou can just be present to fully listen. Honor each person that crosses your path byngiving them your undivided attention, in that very special moment, and you’ll findnyou honor yourself most of all.