Did you know your marriage communication skills (or lack thereof) could make or break your marriage? Millions of couples divorce each year and for many of them communication problems are what ultimately made the relationship fall apart. If you want to make sure your relationship becomes one of the few that do not end in bitter divorce or if you are already having struggles but want to ensure you pull things back together, your communication skills are the starting point.
When Things Are Going Great
The time to start working on communication in marriage is when things are going really great. When you and your spouse are are head-over heals for each other and the fights are near nonexistent, it is very hard to imagine anything ever going wrong. Patience is plenty, hugs are freely given, and neither of you can do any wrong.
That is a great place to be, but your relationship will not remain in that place if your marriage communication skills are not very strong. No matter how good things are today, there will be rough patches eventually. Without great communication skills and a strong understanding of one another, it will be very difficult making it through married life.
When Things Fall Apart
Your marriage doesn't have to reach a point where everything totally falls apart or where you feel distance between the two of you, but many do. Often, this feeling of separation happens when the two of you are going through less than ideal circumstances and aren't connecting as you should.
For instance, when someone loses a job, a home goes into foreclosure, or someone passes away, the strain within the marriage can become intense. If you are not listening to one another and speaking to one another in the appropriate manner, then your marriage is going to suffer the consequences. The last thing someone under tremendous stress or in the process of grieving wants is to feel as if they are misunderstood or not being listened to, but that is exactly what happens when communication in marriage is not being carried out correctly.
Making It Work
The trick with marriage is not to get lucky and have a perfect life where nothing ever goes wrong and strain is never placed on the relationship. That simply doesn't happen. Everyone has their struggles in life, and when you are living as a Christian couple those struggles have to be mutually endured. Yet, those hard times are where most couples start to pull away from one another simply because their
marriage communication skills are not solid. Under the stress and tension of hard times, the cracks in communication become obvious.
So, what is the key to making a marriage work?
Well, there are many key ingredients to making your marriage work. The biggest ingredient is God; He must not be left out of your marriage covenant. The Bible has excellent principles regarding how we should communicate. Like being quick to listen and slow to speak.
In addition, you must learn how to work together even in the worst, most stressful times, so you pull together rather than fall apart. If communication in marriage is very strong everyone will feel understood, valued, and cared for. You will each know that you are respected, loved, and trusted, even when everything else is going crazy around you.