Midlife Career Support – Giving or Receiving, Is a Very Worthwhile Thing

The local library in my home town provides its facilities to host a “Professionals in Transition” meeting every other week. Public libraries have always been good providers of resources to people in need. Given the current economy and labor market such sessions have become much more common in many locations.

I had the pleasure of attending a recent session this past week and came away inspired by the comments of one of the gentlemen present. We were asked by this week's speakers to introduce ourselves and indicate why we were attending the session. Many indicated they had been out of work for awhile and were looking forward to the topic being presented for that day on "Branding Themselves" for prospective employers. Others were new entrepreneurs also focused on the topic of the day. And, then we came to Patrick. He proudly introduced himself. He indicated he had been coming to the sessions for awhile and that the best part was meeting the fellow attendees and getting to know them. Most of all, he stressed he was there to support all those that were there, just as they were supporting him, individuals going through a common experience of looking to restructure their career aspirations at the midpoint of their life.

Support isn't always something easy to give or receive. When asked to give it, there may be conce
around what to say or how to say it. If one is in need of it, there can be an awkward feeling in displaying ones vulnerability in reaching out to someone. However, during time of transition, it can often be a lead factor in getting one through the steps they need to take to move onto achieving the life changing goals they are seeking to reach.

When faced with change or doubt in one's life, a support structure or group can provide many benefits. These include:

* Gaining the benefit of and the perspectives of many people while not having to rely exclusively on our own thoughts. While one may be a very capable person, each one of us is a product of the belief system and assumptions which have taken us to this point in our life. No one person experiences everything or has exposure to every way to go about something. The support of others can provide input and a perspective that we ourselves have never considered.

* Being able to share our thoughts and conce
s with others. This is particularly valuable when our support contacts understand that their role is to listen in a non-judgmental manner. Sometimes the one sharing just needs to be able to let out what they are holding inside. Other times they need to have others hear what they are saying, that they may not hear themselves when thinking about the situation they are facing. This is where intuitive listening comes in handy. Again, while we're accountable for the decisions we make, having as much input as possible to make them is always of value.

* The realization that we are not alone in facing an issue or change we are now making. While it may seem at times that no one has faced exactly our situation, it is almost impossible that that is the case. Knowing that others have been where we have been, faced items at the time they thought may have been daunting and made it to their goals provides inspiration for us as we face our life changing actions.

* Many times when someone else is facing a new challenge we pick up knowledge ourselves on how to deal with that issue when we face it in the future. Those who are open to interacting with others quickly learn that our fellow human beings are both our students and teachers and as a result have a lot to offer us. One does not gain that advantage by trying to handle every situation in life alone.

So, thank you Patrick for reinforcing that lesson in me. Change is tough for most people. When it happens at midlife, it is often more difficult since habits and ways of doing things have been ingrained in a person for longer periods of time. Knowing that you have the support of family, friends or even strangers who become friends in various meetings with them can go a long way in one moving through transition and going forward with a new purpose as they continue to pursue their life's journey.