***Other Peopling and Sense of Self
Written by Barbara J. stepp
Of The classifications of animal, vegetable or mineral, where do we fit? According to most scientific authorities, we are the human animal.
AS WE LOOK into the animal kingdom we discover more often than not there exists a herd. Some people call it a tribe-same thing. And the herd has the power to and does ostracize some members they decide do not fit in. No Fault Psychology™ tells us that we are, in fact, insecure herd animals.
OUR AMATEUR PARENTS have the responsibility to socialize (program) us so we fit into the herd. That is are accepted. We can’t be too different. As a result, we develop the patterns of insecurity-- of fear of abandonment, rejection, and feeling of inadequacy or not good enough; tapping into the primal brain. Ah, yes we are looking for acceptance, security, to fit into the herd. “Here I am, please notice me, I'm looking for a friendly.” We all have different patterns for this. Some people put their names everywhere for that reason. Arrogance or acting superior is used to hide our insecurity.
WE HAVE the fear responses of the herd animals. We spend our lives trying to fit in, to please the herd. And we begin to lessen our sense of self. According to No Fault Psychology™ this is Other Peopling.
HOW DO WE get beyond those fear patterns? By realizing that they are childhood patterns programmed by our amateur parents who did the best they could. As an amateur parent, I did not receive an instruction/operators manual. If you did, I’d appreciate it if you would forward one to me.
By remembering that since we are responsAble adults, no one can make us feel those old, childish yucky feelings. By realizing that we have the ability to choose our responses. But how? By getting curious with a sense of humor, a very productive state, “I wonder what that’s about and how I can outgrow that unwanted pattern of behavior.” Becoming aware of the pattern causes it to decrease intensity. They are only patterns, after all.
SINCE OUR LANGUAGE creates our reality, we can outgrow our unproductive patterns of language as well. “Overcome” is not a valuable word as it sets up a fight with ourselves, which leads to warring internal conflict. You can also change “fear” to “conce
ed” and lessen the intensity of the word.
SO WE BECOME AWARE of our not-useful language and recognizing it, interrupt the pattern first (do anything else), and consciously change the language to what you want. Since questions direct our focus, simply ask a better question like “How can I re-direct my focus?” Or “How can I feel better?” “What’s the best thing For Me to do right now?”
IN SUMMARY…… Get curious, interrupt the patterns of our behaviors, and edit our language.
EXPERIMENT AND VALIDATE it for yourself. Pay attention as you feel the powerful difference, further developing your stronger sense of self, remembering that fear is the opposite of love. Unconditional self-love allows us to be more loving towards others.
Albert Einstein said, "The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift."
David Rolland Dobson, Ph.D., father of No Fault Psychology said, "The primary function of the Other Than Conscious™ mind is to see that we are a healthy specimen and successful a specimen of this critter as we can be."
To acquire or learn more practical skills, abilities, look to http://www.simplyhypnosis.com
©Copyright Barbara J Stepp, Premier Coach/Consultant, Clinical Hypnotherapist, No Fault Psychology™, Other tha
Conscious Communication™, NLP, DHE® Master Trainer
Article author
About the Author
Barbara J. Stepp has been in the personal development field coaching,consulting,teaching for over 45 years and still going. Her work is legendary in individual and business fields.
She is a published author.
To quote John La Valle,MBA,” Barbara is vivacious, determined, funny, and energetic. She is a trainer who will make you laugh and feel good about yourself, and will latch on to a problem and not stop until you solve it. She’s one of the few trainers we can refer to.”
Dr. Richard Bandler says, “There is none better.”
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