Out with the Old – In with the New

Doesn't it seem that life was so much easier when there were no IPhone’s, IPad’s, IPod's, texting , IM’s, Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn? Now everyone has smart phones, e-mails and voice mail. Add the pressure from work, the economy, money issues and the housing market and it’s no wonder our relationships have become affected.

The convergence of technology and crisis creates the perfect storm to threaten the core stabilizer of all relationships including marriage - communication. As a society, we have succumbed to quick and easy ways of communicating at the expense of the hallmark of all interaction since the beginning of time - face -to-face. Add the stressors of everyday life and you can see how relationships become less of a priority and ultimately fail.

However, all is not lost. Partners who seek that reconnection with each other can do so by getting back to basics. Having uninterrupted time together to check in with each other face to face without cell phones, TV, computers and other outside distractions can enhance the communication that can get lost in the busy world we live in. This is the time to truly allow each partner to touch base with the relationship which when done in person allows both people to feel the safety and intimacy that had been missing. Doing this if not daily, at least throughout the week will strengthen the bonds of any relationship even more so if married.

For those who seek to go within to understand the triggers which may be sabotaging their relationship, life coaching may be very beneficial. Spending time one-on-one to uncover the layers that can affect your communication with your partner is very effective, does not take very long and is quite economical when you look at the alte
ative of being unhappy with yourself and in your relationship.

Having said this, there may be married couples that after attempting all of the above decide their life would be better and happier apart. If this is true, don't worry -there is hope. A more amicable, less stressful solution to conventional divorce with atto
eys is Pro Se Mediation. By allowing a skilled and experienced mediator settle the complicated financial and emotional issues couples have when ending their marriage is much less costly and more desirable. Another benefit is that the time to finalize the terms of the divorce is reduced significantly. It allows both parties to decide the outcome of their divorce without the animosity that can occur when a marriage ends. When children are involved, this process is helpful in creating a less hostile environment between the parents going forward. Selecting a certified mediator who is also an atto
ey can enhance this experience by having a legal perspective during this difficult time. Pro Se Divorce mediation is as successful as the parties allow it to be. Being open to compromise is the hallmark of this process and those who are able to put aside their differences for the common good of each other sets the stage for the next step in their lives. All is not lost when we allow ourselves to be open to all possibilities for a right and perfect outcome for all involved.