Positive Parenting

POSITIVE PARENTING

Q: How can a parent remain positive when children’s behaviors are so challenging?
A: It involves preplanning using these eight elements.

P (preparation) tell the child what to expect ahead of time. Set rules and guidelines. If there is not a set guideline, then tell the child you cannot answer the request until you have time to think it over. This will eliminate anger that surfaces when a parent is caught off guard.
O (organization) state what the consequences will be for which behaviors. Post the consequences on charts either in words or pictures depending on their reading ability.
S (support) get others to work with you as a tag team consistently having the same rules no matter whether it is with the spouse, stepparent, relatives, teachers, and/or a therapist, if necessary.
I (innovation) come up with a workable plan that is appropriate for your situation, helpful to you and not harmful to the child
T (timeliness) whoever is tending to the child address inappropriate behavior when it happens and every time it occurs.
I (integration) can use a combination of techniques that are tailored to work for you and your child.
V (values) children will see how you behave and respond to that more than what you tell them they should value.
E (energy take time to reenergize yourself and do not to have a child-centered home.

Q: What do you do when all these techniques are employed and they are not sufficient?
A: Go to the “Help Starts Here.org” or check with your insurance company to look for a therapist that can help you assess what is needed for you and your child.

Q: What else can you do beyond these eight positive steps?
A: When speaking to your child get down to their eye level. If you ask them to do a task have them repeat back to you what they have heard. Break the task down into manageable parts and if needed, draw pictures to explain it. Reward them occasionally with some positive reinforcement for behaving appropriately like renting an approvable DVD, playing a board game of their choice, taking a trip to the library, or receiving a special treat at the grocery store.
When all else fails remember your children may someday have children of their own. You may a have a second chance to try different things with your grandchildren. Maybe then your child will be ready to recognize and accept your wisdom.