Steps for Self Growth and Healing

As we face obstacles and trauma in our lives, we are sometimes forced to make dramatic changes in order to shift the energy and pain. This always results in self-growth and a greater expansion of consciousness. “The more pain, the more gain.” This adage holds a lot of truth but brings no comfort at a time of crisis. It is important to remember that everything is a process. One must move through the process. There is no way to bypass being human. But there is a way to move forward and bring about transformation in one's being. A good way to start is to follow five basic steps to self-growth and healing:

Step one: Set the Intention/Desire for Change
The first and most important step for self-growth and healing is simply to desire change. One must turn inward and take a deep, close look into the heart. “Am I ready for change?” “Do I have the courage to change? “How can I relieve the pain?”
These are important starting questions. Answer them honestly. If a person is ready, the jou
ey can begin.

Step two: Relax/Seek a Serene Place to Heal and Grow
This step may require leaving the comfort zone. It may a trip or seeking a retreat. At this point, one must remove one's self from the “freeze zone.” The freeze zone is that place where a person gets stuck. In this sense, I am talking about physically removing one's self. It's important to find a new setting or environment for healing to take place. The freeze zone could also mean an emotional shut down where a person no longer allows him/her self to feel the full range of emotions. In other words, they are blocked.

Step three: Let go/Release that Which is no Longer of Value
This means that once a person is in a safe place and has begun to relax and quiet the mind, whether it is through breathing, meditation, prayer, or just walking in nature, now the releasing process begins. Yet, sometimes we hold onto the pain because we are comfortable with it. We know what to expect. If we let go, then we sail into the unknown. This is very unsettling for there could be even more pain ahead. At this point it takes trust or faith to move forward. We must break down old walls and barriers. In order to move past the pain, we must feel every inch of it and then let it go.

Step four: Rebuild/Create a New Paradigm & Gain a New Perspective
This step requires “new eyes.” We now can step back from the drama and be an observer. We can see things that we never saw before. We are no longer buried in the constant changing world of emotions. It is now up to us to re-create ourselves. It is at this point that we begin to see that it didn’t happe
TO us, it happened FOR us. That’s right, we gain the perspective that the challenge we faced made us stronger and helped us grow and expand.

Step five: Transform/You are the Master of Your Beautiful Self
Now we begin to realize that we create our existence. No one is responsible for our lives but ourselves. No one is to blame. We learn to forgive others and to forgive ourselves. We take responsibility for where we’ve been and where we are headed. It’s amazing what wheels we start in motion with only a single thought! We are creating our lives and ourselves and our future every moment of every day. And it’s only the moment that counts because it’s all we really have…and in an instant, it too will be gone. So we stay in the moment and we realize that it’s easy to deal with a moment. There’s no way to overwhelm our selves and to ask all those crazy questions that may not have an answer anyway. We just do the best we can in any given moment and live in our hearts with integrity and honesty. We learn how to listen and how to love. All the rest will come easily and with serenity.nn n