The Kissing Cure

Great sex does not begin with rotten kisses. Most people don’t usually think about the “proper” way to kiss—when it comes to the tongue tango, most just wing it. However, each of us probably has encountered enough slobbers, peckers, and tonsil-divers to know that there are right ways and wrong ways to kiss.

Think about it this way. The average person spends over 500 hours of their life kissing. At an approximate length of one minute each, that’s over 30,000 kisses. It’s worth it to learn to kiss well. Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour. Good, rich, passionate kissing uses up to 600 calories an hour. You decide what your preference is.

The fun part in unlocking the secrets to intimacy, passion, romance and great kisses and practice makes perfect, so working on those rotten kisses can lead to passionate puckering. So if at first you don’t succeed… kiss, kiss again.

Intimacy comes in many forms. Kissing is only one of them. Parents give their infants kisses on the checks, head, neck and hands, and in just about any spot to be found. The infant loves it. These brain maps that are created in childhood are taken into adulthood as unconscious styles of relating. Babies who are overwhelmed, over-stimulated, or under-attended-to grow up often doing the same in relating to others: they overwhelm, over stimulate, or under attend.

When the kissing is rotten, all the rest of the stuff that goes along with or following kissing, like hugs, hand holding, whispering, schmoozing, and other such activities will be rotten as well. If sexual intimacy is what you want, if the kisses are rotten, most likely so is it, or you get less of it, like the speedy, good old American “quickie.”

When the kissing goes south, a lot of really great stuff goes away in time, like caring, closeness, sensitivity, esteem and oftentimes the relationship itself.

This is a shame because kissing can be so exciting. No one should be without this enriching, delicious experience in an intimate relationship, especially if you want maximum pleasure. We are born with the capacity to have pleasure. Demand it, or suffer! But know this: the true initial beginning of intimacy is the kiss.

The Kissing Cure by Los Angeles sex therapist Dr. Ruth McConnell can unlock the secrets of a great relationship. nn