The Signs of a Cheating Spouse - That's Not What They Said Before

Something is going on with your significant other. And it ain't good. There is no doubt in your mind that they are fooling around but it appears like they know that you know. So the obvious cheating spouse signs that you read about are not there. Or at least not anything that you can definitely point out.

The smell of some different fragrance? Nope. Working longer hours? Not. Changing their appearance for the other person? As far as you can tell your spouse looks the same.

But you cannot shake your suspicions or the certainty that all is not well. For a brief moment you tell yourself that this is nothing more than your imagination running amuck. That is until your intuition makes its voice heard loud and clear. You are not being paranoid something really is going on.

You think about hiring a private detective but the thought of doing that bothers you something awful. And not just that you would be employing a third party to spy on your spouse but also you would have to pay for it. Investigators especially the ones that are experienced and come highly recommended do not come cheap. So if you hire one and they find nothing then not only will you be embarrassed but you will also be out a considerable amount of cash.

You could always check out the financial statements from your credit cards and see if there is anything that looks out of place. Of course if your spouse has their own separate accounts that may not be possible. Even if the two of you share the same account an odd charge here or there can easily be explained (indeed quite a number of philandering spouses have gotten good at doing just that).

One solution is to start paying close attention to what your spouse is saying and compare it with some of their previous statements. To do this may require you to invest money in your own private journal. Nothing fancy just a notebook or something similar where you can start accurately detailing what is going on.

Some of the inconsistencies may just come out naturally during the course of having a regular conversation with your spouse. But understand there are going to be sticking points and the only way to get to the root of them is to ask questions.

This is where you are going to have to practice a little slickness of your own. Your questions need to come off as just part of the conversation. If it becomes obvious to your significant other that the only reason you are asking these questions is you are trying to catch them in something then they may turn the tables and give you a double dose of lying that you cannot make heads or tails out of. You have to be a little clever to carry on an extramarital affair so do not underestimate them.

Be careful with your journal. Make sure you store it in a place safe from searching eyes. Also be careful of sharing it or your suspicions with anyone including your best friend that you may have known and trusted since grade school. This is an undertaking which you should go about alone.

Understand that recording all of the lies is not the end of the process. It's a means to the next step which is to gather more concrete evidence on your spouse's infidelity.

You don't like how you feel and would love to be mistaken. But you know you are not. This is going to be a painful job and unfortunately a necessary one.