There Is No Better, Just As There Is No Worse

Many of us spend a huge portion of our lives living in the future wishing for things. We want a better car, more money, a bigger house, a raise, a new career in order to make more money, and a thousand other things. Sadly, once we do get these things we want, we still aren't happy.

We are sad when we don't get what we want. We are sad and feel sorrow when we get what we don't want. Often times we are still sad and feel sorrow when we get exactly what we want because we want the next bigger thing and fear losing what we just got. Most of us spend our entire lives wishing things to be a way and to have things that we can't have.

Instead, we must learn to realize that everything is perfect and beautiful as it is. We must learn to live in the present moment and experience life, things, people, places, and experiences just as they are. When we feel pain, we take the time to experience that pain. When we feel happiness, we must take the time to experience that as well and realize that both are natural and serve us.

What people do instead is try to get rid of the pain and they end up in more pain because they can't get rid of it. You may have a headache, and it may hurt I won't deny, but instead of running around complaining about it trying to find medicine to fix it and hating every single moment of it until you do, do as you must and experience the pain. Sure, taking medicine isn't a bad thing, I agree. But we miss the moments during the headache because we are focused on a moment in the future where the pain is gone. Or instead we are some place emotionally and mentally in order to try and forget about the pain.

The same is true for happiness or positive emotions. We soon become sad when we are experiencing love while holding that special someone in our life simply because we realize that those moments will end. Again we are lost in a time and place in the future that has not yet come. Instead of enjoying the experience as it is, right then and there, we fear the moment going away, and end up losing it anyway.

There is no better, just as there is no worse. Moments, experiences, they come and go just as things, places, people, and everything else does. A parent will long for their children to stay young so they can hold onto the "better" times. What we must learn is that every moment is the "better" time.

When we are in pain, it is as beautiful and wonderful as any other time. The pain makes us stronger. It causes us to focus in the moment if we let it. The pain is right here and right now, not some far off time or place. Even a headache can wake us up and make us pay attention. It can be a great experience in life just as love can be if we learn to pay attention and see it for what it is. It is not better or worse to feel pain just as love is not better or worse. Both are natural parts of life and living and allow us to feel alive, to feel real, to connect with the present moment.

We are not better or worse than other people either. Most people are amazed to find out that most successful people are not smarter than they are. They usually don't work harder, and didn't start with more. Most successful people, be with athletics, money, love, or any other area of life are not better and didn't start off better. Their current situation and lifestyle may be more improved and secure than yours, but a vast majority started exactly where and as you are.

Everything is perfect and wonderful and beautiful just as it is in the present moment, including you. I am not saying that you shouldn't set goals or that there is something wrong with wanting to improve your current situation, or yourself. What I am saying is that you shouldn't be so focused on the shoulda, coulda, woulda or the end result so much that you forget about each and every step along the way and how each of those steps feel. Pay attention as you go, and enjoy the good, the bad, and everything in between.