Use Your INTUITION

I walked down the isle headed towards my first husband. There was a screeching voice inside my head that said "Don't do it". Did I listen? No. I just kept walking and smiling. I noticed the melody of the harp and the calming violin, the beautiful flowers my step-mother picked out ever so carefully, the perfectly placed chirping birds, that my dad claimed he hired, for just the right touch. I noticed all the familiar, smiling faces, some genuinely happy, others with looks of curiousity and concern. I just walked right up to where I was supposed to be and went through the motions. I was pronounced doomed.

Eight years later I realized that I had conformed to societies failure rules. In my head it said, "stay married or you will be a failure", "keep trying, through death until you depart", "you made your bed, now you have to lie in it". I stayed in an unhappy marraige with a partner that did not meet my criteria. I also knew that I did not listen to my inner voice, my intuition.

I was able to finally divorce, after so much suffering and some great therapy. My voice became a great friend and I stayed single for 8 years in-between my first and second marraige. Why, because I was going to marry someone who my voice liked.

Using my intution led me to make better choices, boyfriends, friends, jobs etc... I knew to choose a husband again that I had to have a criteria.

I decided to write 30 things I wanted in an ideal partner. I took great care to think about everything I really wanted in a mate. I went big and put everything on the list in the positive. For instance instead of writing "no jerks", I wrote "compassionate".

After looking at my masterful list I realized I wasn't half the things on the list that I wanted. So...I had a lot of work to do. I circled the things on my list that I had to work on and then made those my personal goals. It took a couple of years to actually become the things I wanted in a partner. It was worth it! I am happily married now for the past 7 years. What a difference it makes when you use your intuition and actually have a criteria. You deserve it!

Marla Stone, MSW