What Are The Ten Signs To Tell If Your Relationship Is Failing

Many clients come to me telling me I am the last resort for saving their relationship. Talk about pressure! They say they feel angry and resentful. Some say they have given up hope or feel numb to their partner. They tell me that I am their last hope before contacting the lawyers. Sometimes, it is too late and the walls are up and can’t come down. Sometimes I can see a spark of caring still there, and the relationship can be saved and improved.

Why can some relationships be changed and some cannot? There is not just one answer, but a lot of factors need to be in place. Timing is one of these factors. You need to get help while you still care enough to invest the time and commitment to make the changes necessary to save your relationship. No one is in love all the time, but if most of the time, things are good and you feel that your partner genuinely cares and is well intentioned; then the little annoyances and aggravations can be worked on and managed.

You need to ask yourself why you are still in the relationship. If you can honestly answer that you still love your partner and are happy with him, most of the time, then it is worthwhile to stay and work on the relationship. If, on the other hand, the only reasons you are staying are because you feel guilty, can’t afford to leave, are afraid of being alone or are “staying for the kids”, then you have already detached and left the relationship emotionally and are just waiting for the details to be worked out.

The average person can take up to 5 years to actually leave. That is a long time to be unhappy, feeling resentful, stuck and alone. What if instead of just tolerating your situation you took some steps to see if you could improve it. Obviously, if there are problems in a couple relationship, it is ideal to go for couple counseling, but you would be surprised how much progress and clarity you can get from going alone. On your own, you can improve your self-esteem and self-confidence. You can learn how to set boundaries, express your needs calmly and find constructive ways for dealing with your frustrations. These tools can make a huge difference in your life and will have a positive ripple effect in your relationships.

Here are 10 signs that will tell you if your relationship is at serious risk of ending:
1. Every conversation seems to end in a fight
2. You can’t remember the last time you enjoyed being together
3. One or both of you show increasing disrespect for each other
4. Sexual intimacy is low or nonexistent
5. You don’t sleep in the same bedroom
6. You feel contempt for or from your partner
7. You do not trust your partner anymore
8. You are happier when you are alone than you are with your partner
9. You are repelled or repulsed by any demonstration of affection
10. You feel emotionally numb and detached from the relationship

If you have not reached this level yet, there is till hope. Don’t wait until it’s too late.