Brian James
Free
Divorce Mediator Expert
Brian James Quick Facts
- Main Areas
- Peaceful Divorces
Brian James is an experienced Divorce and Family Mediator with offices throughout Chicagoland and Southeaste
Wisconsin. He started his mediation practice, C.E.L. and Associates, in late 2005.
Brian earned his B.S. in Sociology from Northern Illinois University in 1994 and completed training in Mediation and Conflict Resolution at Northweste
University.
The first 10 years of his professional career, Brian worked in the Criminal Justice System helping domestic violence and divorcing families resolve family conflicts. He assisted with the healing process that took place after these life-changing events had occurred. His approach to mediation is client driven. By aiding his clients with the resolution of their divorce issues outside of the courtroom, Mr. James helps create a win/win situation for all parties in a divorce.
He is able to help people work through their problems, and at the same time, give them skills to use in future conflicts. With mediation, we help people work through their conflicts while teaching them problem solving, empathy; self-determination and giving them the ability to make informed decisions for themselves. When confronted with a conflict, if they refer back to what they learned in mediation, I will have achieved my objective.
Articles by this expert
SelfGrowth articles and saved writing connected to this expert.
Article
Making a New Second Home After Divorce
A family home, whether in an apartment or house, gives your family's lives context and stability. Moving into a new home can be extremely stressful for the entire family, especially for the children. A new neighborhood or surroundings changes the dynamics of your child's life. Given these facts, adjusting to a second home when a parent relocates can take stress to heightened levels. But there are ways that parents can mitigate the stress of adjusting to a second home.
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Making Technology a Link Between You and Your Child
A parent is many things to their child. There are not enough nouns in the English language to accurately describe the many and varied roles that parents play in their children's lives. They are everything from cook to coach and supporter to story reader. In short, parents are everything to their children. One thing that they are, especially when separated, is a presence. A child should feel that they are, wherever they are, their parent's child. Being a presence in your child's life is a big job, no matter what your family dynamic or situation.
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Making Child Care Changes Work For You
While it is always advantageous to maintain consistency when a couple is establishing two separate households there are always some gaps. One primary area where some coordination is required is the question of child care. Whether it is a nanny, housekeeper, or babysitter, it is often difficult for parents to use the same child care professional in both homes. Different localities and financial considerations often require a parent to seek out their own nanny. This has advantages and disadvantages.
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Consider Co-Mediation for Divorce
Couples filing for divorce should be aware of a new service called co mediation. In a traditional divorce, both husband and wife hire a divorce atto ey. Couples are encouraged to fight for what they want with a divorce atto ey. And the result is a divorce process that takes months or years to complete.
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The Role of Mediation in Parental Alienation Syndrome
There are degrees of conflict in every divorce, some very minor but others that have a severe and far-reaching impact. Conflict and anger at its extreme can result in Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS). This occurs when one parent consciously or unconsciously sabotages the relationship between their children and their other parent. This is far beyond an occasional angry outburst or a disparaging remark. It involves relentless and inflated outbursts and comments that are designed to turn a child against a parent.
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Use Mediation to Save Money During the Holiday Season
Planning for the holidays begins long before they occur and starts with making the best use of our resources year-round. The expenses we incur associated with separation and divorce become even more critical because each partner is facing the loss of an income, two households, and most importantly, the needs of the children. At times like the holiday season many people look back over the funds they have spent throughout the year and wonder how they could have made better financial decisions.
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Continuity in the Care of Your Children
Consistency is something that I think most people desire as part of their lives. Though change brings the opportunity for new beginnings and renewal, the things that give us a "sameness" are comforting. This is especially true for children. The people and things that remain consistent and steady make children feel safe and secure. But the advent of a separation and divorce can shake that feeling of security for children. There are ways to minimize the emotional impact of change in your children's lives.
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The Dilemma of Health Insurance After Divorce
When looking at this issue it is easy to be mislead into thinking that there are easy solutions to this problem. Current research gives some very pat answers to a question that is extremely complex. The key to understanding the insurance dilemma facing divorced spouses is to look at long term solutions and to understand the need for an advisor to negotiate the process.
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Qualities to Look For in a Mediator
Every time we consult a professional we think about what qualities will make this relationship successful. We want a doctor with compassion and caring. We want a teacher with energy and enthusiasm. But what do we want in a mediator? Is it all skill and abilities? Is it communication? Because a mediator wears a number of "hats" it is not just one thing. A mediator is someone who, by nature of their role, has to be many things and today I will discuss three qualities that a mediator must have as a basis for their personality and attitude towards their work.
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Wise Decisions: Cost Issues in Divorce Mediation vs. Litigation
When approaching the ending of a marriage and how to go about it, divorcing couples are faced with many hard decisions. Whether to choose mediation over litigation is fundamental and primary in the divorce process. When couples weigh the pluses and minuses of both choices, the factor of cost must be of primary concern. The costs of divorce litigation are both significant and a source of conce for couples as well as even the atto eys that may represent them.
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What Is Divorce Mediation
Divorce mediation is about you and your soon to be ex-spouse deciding your own divorce and what is best for the both of you and most importantly, your children. In mediation, you and your spouse meet with a neutral third party, the mediator, and with their help, you work through the issues you need to resolve so the two of you can end your marriage as amicably and cost effective as possible. The issues covered include but are not limited to the following: 1. Distribution of Property (Assets/Liabilities) 2. Child Custody and Parenting Time 3. Child Support/Maintenance
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The Fork in the Road: Which way you travel is Important
Whenever we meet bumps in the road, there is usually more than one path to choose. We make these choices as we choose a school, a career, a home, and a mate. But these choices, like all choices, are rarely written in stone. One of the beauties of life is that we get to evaluate and consider our decisions many times and make changes and adjustments as time goes on. These decisions don’t come without stress, effort, and pain, such as the choice to end a marriage. But simply choosing to end a marriage doesn’t mean that all the decisions are made.
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Contacting Brian James
Brian James
C.E.L. & Associates, Inc.
Divorce Mediation & Therapy Services
www.yourdivorce.org
www.startmakingsenseofdivorce.com
http://www.linkedin.com/pub/2/6ba/133
(312) 524-5829 (cell)
(847) 249-0570 (fax)