Ronald Alexander
PhD
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Four Myths About Mindfulness Meditation
The majority of my clients resist mindfulness meditation at first, although the time commitment is small and the payoff is enormous. One insisted that it wasn’t necessary and that she didn’t have enough time in her day to devote to a regular practice. Then she went through the loss of a parent, and had such trouble coping that she couldn’t even drag herself out of bed. After missing work ten days straight, she called me for my advice. I told her to mindfully meditate while in bed. Terrified and bewildered, my client did and, in a few days, found that she could face going to work again.
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5 Strategies to Stop Sabotaging Change in Your Life
I often see patients in my psychotherapy practice who are unable to make changes in their life and do not understand why they keep sabotaging their efforts. Usually this is due to a hidden resistance or unwholesome belief associated with the desired change. There are five hindrances that I’ve found to be particularly common in the experience of resisting needed or inevitable change: the hindrances of wanting, illusory thinking, sleeping mind, restlessness, and doubt.
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4 Easy Steps to Mindfully Reduce Stress
It seems that every time we hear about the untimely and tragic death of a celebrity it is due to a lethal combination of recreational drugs, prescription medications and alcohol. And in the midst of the controversy is the issue of irresponsible doctors prescribing antidepressant medication like candy. In similar fashion are we not prematurely drugging a nation of young children with drugs such as Ritalin and Adderall that have the potential of adversely affecting their developing brains?
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How to Make Real Change in Your Life
Want to make a change in your life? Whether it’s losing weight, a career change, or remaking a relationship if you want to make any real and lasting changes then you can’t do it alone. I work with hundreds of patients and workshop attendees who desire to transform their lives and one of the first points I tell them is that for real success they initially need to build a Wisdom Council of Support. Like an owner assembling a start-up baseball team you begin with those players who are already available to you, being mindful of the strengths and weaknesses of each.
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Too Busy to Meditate? Think Again!
The benefits of meditation are many and varied from reducing stress, blood pressure, heart attacks, and strokes to increasing one’s cognition and creativity. As well meditation decreases our need for sleep by heightening our concentration, allowing us to be more productive. Ray Kroc, who took over McDonald’s in its early days and built it into a business of outstanding success, once reported that he’d spontaneously fall into states of meditative reverie during the day and thus didn’t need a lot of sleep.
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How To Let Go of Negative Self-Judgments
Many people cling to the myth that those who are successful inevitably feel good about themselves and are free from self-doubt and insecurities. I’ve worked with many clients whose résumés, personal achievements, and reputations garner the deepest respect and admiration, yet their negative self-talk is often utterly brutal. Despite their low opinion of themselves, they’ve managed to fashion lives that many would envy.
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Cyber-Bullying – It’s Not Cool to Be Cruel
We’ve all heard the horror stories of young adults and children having hurtful or embarrassing photos, video and/or speech about them posted on the Internet for the world to see. But did you know that cyber-bullying can be as simple as sending an email to someone who has indicated they do not want to have any further contact with you? I also have a personal dislike for all the chain emails that go out, especially those that indicate something will or won’t happen if you don’t forward it on to ten or more of your friends.
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The Wanting Mind of Depression
As a therapist in Los Angeles I’ve seen more than my share of patients who are dealing with various forms of depression and unhappiness. One common personality trait I’ve found with them is their unwholesome thoughts and beliefs that come from what I call the “wanting mind.” In wanting mind, we feel that our current state of unhappiness can only be cured if we have more money, recognition, fame, or power.
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