2011 Making Changes: One Step at a Time
Written by Stuart A. Kaplowitz
Before you list out all the things you may want to change in your life, and overwhelm yourself in the process, start with with the idea that you will have success. Take some deep breathes and say "I can make the changes I want." If you can, try to focus on one or two hopes to address. This will allow enhanced focus and a more manageable one.
You see, the more we add to our plates, the more likely we are to become overwhelmed and get off track. Furthermore, the more quickly you can accomplish the first item, the more time you will have feeling successful and hopeful in accomplishing the next goal.
In writing down the first goal, let's be as specific as we can with the hope and exactly what you may think you can do to achieve the goal. For example, saying I want to be more organized this year is a bit nebulous. List out what being more organized to you looks like, such as "I want to set goals for each day (even if these are just "to do" things) and accomplish them."
So now let's brainstorm ways to do this. List out every idea you can think of to best accomplish this goal. Here are some samples:
1) Maybe get a planner which you can keep with you throughout the day.
2) Transfer all current "to do" list items into your planner. This may consist of items stored in your memory, work calendar, notes on your refrigerator, etc.
3) Add any work / home activities or responsibilities you need to accomplish in the appropriate day entry.
4) Ask friends and loved-ones or co-workers for any upcoming events you need to be aware of and write them in.
5) At the end of the day, review and check off what you were able to accomplish and transfer any left-over items to tomorrow's entry or later.
6) Start each day by reviewing the day's items.
These are examples of ways to keep yourself on task to accomplish the goal of wanting to make sure what I need to do for each day. If your goal is to perhaps get more enjoyment out of life, again, getting creative and being specific on how may help. Here are some sample ideas to help:
1) Make a list of all the fun things you have done in your life. Hopefully, this is a big list.
2) Add items you have thought of doing but, for whatever reason, you have yet to do.
3) Ask others what they do for fun or when they are feeling down. Any that sound good, add to the list.
4) Perhaps on the other side of the paper, write out the things in your life that may drag you down or take up a lot of energy. While adding more of the things you want in your life, you could also be deciding how to alleviate (or at least lessen some of the effect of) the items on this back side of the paper.
5) Consider adding more positive people / friends to your life. This adds more positive energy to our lives and can help our outlook.
These are just some examples to consider in the objective of enjoying life more. Whatever the goal you want to start with, take time to outline exactly what it could look like and the steps to make it happen. Good luck with the NEW YEAR and know it is possible.
Stuart A. Kaplowitz, MFT
http://fwd4.me/Cku
Article author
About the Author
Stuart Kaplowitz, MFT, has been in the field of counseling for 20 years. He has managed and directed clinical programs and now works out of his Chino office. With Lacey Witham, MFT Registered Intern, they offer marriage counseling, couples counseling, family counseling, etc., in the Chino and Chino Hills area
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