A Consistent Parenting Style

I believe a parenting style that is consistent creates calm parents and well adjusted children, the perfect ingredients of a happy family.

As a parent educator and family counselor with many years experience in observing behavioral problems, it is apparent to me that many parents who struggle to maintain peaceful children and calm households, live with inconsistency, unpredictability and a lack of self discipline within their own lives.

This lack of consistency follows through into their parenting style, creating significant problems in ordinary daily routines such as bedtimes and meal times. Coupled with poor limit setting and contradictory boundaries which fuel out of control behavior, it's not surprising that temper tantrums and anguish, over tiredness and anxiety, seem to rule their days.

I have also observed that the majority of parents who come seeking help are usually warm, loving, intelligent people, doing all they can to provide security and happiness for their children. They are usually totally perplexed when their family life just feels so stressed instead of the environment they hoped to foster.

If being inconsistent within yourself translates into being inconsistent in your parenting, then that is good news; because it's far easier to fix yourself then to try to fix anyone else!!
Let's look at what a consistent parenting style is
Firstly, what consistent parenting is NOT!

A consistent parenting style is not about being stuck, and unchanging. Nor is it about carrying out rigid routines and schedules. It is not about being authoritarian and inflexible, or about being rigid, dictatorial and domineering. Let go any notion that consistent parenting will be stodgy, boring and humdrum.

Instead, because consistent parenting creates more control for both parents and children, there is much more spontaneity and magic, adventure and surprise in families who practice being consistent. Why?

Because children who are calm and centered and not struggling and fighting against ordinary daily routines, have a far greater capacity for challenges and adventure, as do their parents! In fact a consistent parenting style is far from being unchanging!

What consistent parenting IS!
What does it mean to be consistent? It means being reliable, dependable and constant.

Consistent Parenting is about understanding what we mean and carrying out our intuitive parenting by being consistent with that.
It means being consistent in striving for the best for ourselves and our children - looking after our emotional maturity as parents - recognizing when we could do better and acknowledging when we have done well in our parenting.

It means saying what you mean clearly, being firm with your intent, and then being consistent with your actions.
Consistent parenting is about being loving, calm, centered and responsive as parents. Being firm, clear and consistent creates both sociable, happy children and calm, contented parents.

Being consistent requires making a decision to change your approach to your parenting and sticking to it - surprisingly, it usually only takes a short time to change even some firmly embedded behavior. And yes, it is possible, even for parents who struggle with being consistent in simple habits. The pay back from adopting a consistent parenting style is so good that is becomes it own steadily self-reinforcing reward.

Read more about Consistent Parenting and how to implement a consistent approach at Consistent Parenting Advice.com/nn