Are Women Really that Unhappy?

“Since 1972, women's overall level of happiness has dropped, both relative to where they were forty years ago, and relative to men. You find this drop in happiness in women regardless of whether they have kids, how many kids they have, how much money they make, how healthy they are, what job they hold, whether they are married, single or divorced, how old they are, or what race they are. (The one and only exception: African-American women are now slightly happier than they were back in 1972, although they remain less happy tha African American men.)” ~ Marcus Buckingham, What’s Happening to Women’s Happiness? What’s up with that? With all the opportunities that have opened up for women over the past several decades professionally, economically, politically, emotionally, Spiritually, one might think that would lead to an increase in happiness and satisfaction, right? WRONG! Compared to men, women begin their lives happier and more fulfilled then men. Yet as the years goes on, their level of satisfaction significantly decreases. The older we get the less satisfied we are with our relationships, the things we have accumulated and our finances. You see we think that job status, social status and accumulating lots of stuff will make us happy. Being Super Woman and “having it all” will finally get us to that place we are all hurrying up to get to. Where exactly is that place we are rushing to anyway? In Buckingham’s article he goes on to share many statistics about the state of happiness, or lack there of, for women across the globe. He has even gone so far as to write a book about why he thinks this is happening! Now I have not read his book, but I have my own ideas as to why women may be experiencing this unhappiness. I’m glad you asked, here’s what I think. Women are unhappy because we are so detached from Spirit and ourselves. That’s it. We spend so much time on the career, on the needs of our family, on keeping up with what’s cool in our circle of friends, that we neglect the most important relationships there are: the relationship with our SELF and with our Highest power. If we continue to look outside ourselves for satisfaction and fulfillment of course our level of happiness and inner contentment will decline! If we continue to think that by getting married it will solve the problem of feeling lonely, and by having children it will solve the problem of feeing empty or that climbing the career ladder will solve the problem of feeling unimportant, then all we are doing is prolonging the inevitable. No wonder as women get older there is a steady decrease in overall happiness. After years of living this lie we are coming face-to-face with our reality. All this time and energy we have put into what we thought would make us happy, and here we are starting all over again trying to figure it out like it’s day one again. We look around at all we “have” and still there is something missing. You may have a loving family, a beautiful home, a satisfying career and you may wonder, “How can I ask for more? So many people don’t even have what I have and I want MORE?” And you punish yourself with guilt. It is my belief that YOU are that missing piece. YOU are what you are wanting more of, a deeper connection to your inner guidance and wisdom. And that is a result of a deeper connection to your Highest power, however that resonates for you. We were created with the intention to be brilliant, magnificent beings and what you are longing for, what will give you unlimited happiness and inner contentment is your connection to that brilliance! Your Personal Development Assignment If you are (or know) one of these women I have been discussing here and you are feeling this steady decline in your happiness, first know this: you are not alone. Second, there are ways to reverse this decline in your happiness (without medication) and take you to levels of joy and inner contentment you will never want to be without again. Here’s one way to get started. Read this everyday for 30 days:

• “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.~ Marianne Williamson”
• Pause everyday~ Make time everyday only for you. Whether it’s for meditation, to walk, or just to consciously breathe, make time just for you to stop and connect inside.
• Invest in your SELF~ Be willing to invest in your growth and development and don’t ever stop. Every penny you spend on getting to know your SELF better, on deepening your connection within will come back to you multi-fold in tangible and intangible ways.
• Create your support system ~ Enroll the people you can count on to support you in your inner journey. If you need to, go outside your regular circle and create a new one that will get you the support and like-minded guidance you seek.
(To read the article by Marcus Buckingham in it’s entirety click here http://www.oprah.com/article/money/career/20091005-orig-marcus-buckingham-happiness).