BEING OKAY WITH BEING AVERAGE
Legacy signals
Legacy popularity: 6,402 legacy views
Legacy rating: 3.3/5 from 6 archived votes
BEING OKAY WITH BEING AVERAGE
Byr
Bill Cottringer
“Ain’t no man can avoid being born average, but there ain’t no man got to be common. ~Satchel Page.
In reality, the great majority of people fall within the “average” range of the so-called Bell Curve. Most people are average in all the many things we seem to need to have to succeed past life’s challenges and get to the finish line with a prize—intelligence, aptitudes, motivation, self-confidence, energy, creativity, personality, good looks, moral development, wealth, health, happiness and a slew of other characteristics and skills.
Although most people are in fact just average, many struggle with accepting and dealing with that bleak reality given the over-glamorized, unrealistically ideal image and results loudly packaged by the mass-marketing media machine (4-M). For many average people, the gap between where they are and where they would like to be, with a little influence from 4-M, is too huge to want to do anything about it. In too many cases the result is a sad, quiet life of desperation going unsung.
So, how can just average people learn to better accept and deal with these average cards they are dealt with, so that they can feel just as happy, successful, worthwhile and contented as the ideal shadow-makers that set the high-in-the-sky standard? Here are a few solid tips from the unglamorous, average, in-between trenches of the Bell Curve:
1. First, it is generally a good idea to understand and accept the reality that growing your acceptance and patience with time is probably the main test in life that puts all humans together in the same boat. This is true no matter how high up on the Totem Pole the IQ, happiness thermometer, work success, achievements, good looks, bank accounts or anything else are. If there is one thing we can all call the same common monkey on our back, it is in having to face unacceptable things that we all have to eventually learn to accept and be more patient with. Of course, death goes a long way to make a level playing field.
2. The greatest gifts we are all given equally at birth are opportunity, choices and time. Even average people have the very same and equal opportunity and time to make all the right choices to get somewhere good in life. The thing to accept here is that it just might take a little longer, be a harder road to travel on and require more effort, than is advertised by the 4-M. But my personal experience has been that the longer I had to wait for something good to happen and the more effort I made in trying to make it happen, the more I enjoyed what I ended up with, even with just an “average” prize.
3. Each person in the Bell Curve, from the middle to both ends, is given a unique mission in life and a special gift to accomplish that personal purpose. Success equally eludes anyone—no matter where he or she is under the Bell Curve—until that unique purpose is discovered and the gift is developed and used to get results in helping us all unravel the self-imposed limitations of this monstrous, hostage-taking Bell Curve.
4. We invented the Bell Curve as a short cut to predict important things like achievement potential in school and work, so we could see the end before it happened. In doing so, we crammed a lot of untrue realities in the middle of this Bell Curve that have had very unhappy endings for too many good people. Of course what we “invented” we can just as easily un-invent, especially when it becomes obsolete, like all the seemingly best things usually do sooner or later. This is what popular new “theories” do, like The Secret or Positive Psychology—trying to make us more aware of the reality of unlimited human potential to go beyond average in ways we never imagined.
Opportunity, choices and time are really all equally distributed, no matter what your present perception may be. And “Average” is just a word used by people who don’t want their particular spot on the Bell Curve too crowded. In the end, the Bell Curve is just a pencil line that can be easily erased. It never really existed anyway.
Article author
About the Author
William Cottringer, Ph.D. is President of Puget Sound Security in Bellevue, WA and also a business and personal success coach, sport psychologist, photographer and writer living in the mountains of North Bend. He is author of several business and self-development books, including, Passwords to The Prosperity Zone, You Can Have Your Cheese & Eat It Too, The Bow-Wow Secrets, Do What Matters Most, “P” Point Management, Reality Repair Rx and reality Repair coming shortly from Global Vision Press. He can be contacted with comments or questions at 425 454-5011 or bcottringer@pssp.net
Further reading
Further Reading
Article
Turn Your Weaknesses into Strengths
Every one of us has an attribute to our characters that we do not like and are constantly trying to change. Sometimes we go to great lengths buying ourselves stashes and stashes of self improvement books, attending seminar after seminar and paying outrageous consultation fees for psychologists, psychiatrists and life c
Related piece
Article
Why the Devil Hasn't Cut You a Deal Yet: The VAlue of HArd Work
Force equals motion. - Isaac Newton I am regularly approached by a lot of people who want me to 'help' them become better creatives. They want the cell numbers of celebrated/famous people I know. They want me to write about them in one of my columns. They want a tweet, hooked up with gigs, want an acting job etc. They
Related piece
Article
How To Identify Opportunities Everwhere
A friend of mine recently mentioned that a relative of his grew up in the gemstone rich Chiadzwa area in Zimbabwe's Manicaland province. She used to play games with some of the stones which were lying around everywhere. To them, these were ordinary stones which were extremely beautiful and yet of no value. It was only
Related piece
Article
Make the right decisions today
Around this time last year, I made a decision which today, one year later, is proving quite difficult to undo. Despite my initiative, right thinking, gratitude and all the self help theories, I still find myself tangled in the aftermath of that very unwise decision A decision made today, is like a tree that you plant.
Related piece