Concrete Resolutions

January is usually the month when people make resolutions for the new year they are about to embark on. We review and take account of what was done the previous year and what was not done; what we did accomplish or not accomplish. I believe it is absolutely a good thing to examine and take inventory of our life to see where we are, where we are going, and where we have been. There are things we will find that we do not like and things going on in our life that we do like.

However, I don't know that we should wait a whole year before we review our life. We should take inventory every couple of months. This will help us to stay aligned with goals we have set for ourselves. The review will show us how much or how little we have accomplished. It also gives us the opportunity to change and expand our goals. If we review our lives on a more consistent basis, we are more likely to remember the goals we have set and we will press on in achieving them.

Another thing I encourage people to do is to write down their goals. Let's face it, life happens and things we did not expect to take place sometimes do. Life is full of surprises. We can get so caught up with life happenning and get discouraged to the point we forget our goals and they soon become a thing of the past. Before we know it another year has gone by and we still have the same goals to accomplish that we have had for the past 3 years. How might you change that this year?

One of the reasons people do not succeed in their New Year's resolutions is that their goals are not concrete. We often speak in general terms. We say stuff like, "I want to look better", "I need to lose some weight", "I want to feel better about myself", "I want to have a better marriage", "I'd like to make more money", "I want to be a better person", and the general list goes on and on. We must get more specific about what "better" and "more" means. How much more and how much better would you be satisfied with? Our goals will usually start out in general terms, but then we must make them solid. We must attach arms and legs to them. How do we accomplish that? Simple, just be more specific about what it is you truly want. What do you really want to see happen with your marriage, relationship, friendships, finances, career, attitude, lifestyle, etc? What specificly is your heart revealing to you to change about any aspect of your life? Make your goal(s) as specific as you can. Be specific about what exactly you want, when you want to accomplish it, and how you will accomplish it.

For example, your general goal might be to lose some weight. How much weight would you be satisfied losing? When would you like to have that weight off? Remember, be specific, but also realistic. Now, a concrete goal for losing weight might look something like this. "My goal is to lose 50 lbs. in 6 months through exercise and a reformed eating regiment." Another example, your general goal might be to build a better marriage this year. What is "better" to you? That can mean communicating more, more romance, not yelling or fighting, respecting eachother, and the list can go on and on. Having a better marriage to you means something different for your friend desiring to create a better marriage. A concrete goal for a better marriage might look something like this. "My goal is to build a deeper intimate relationship with my wife by sitting down with her after work and listening to her share with me about her day 3 times a week for the entire year."

You can see why it is important to write your goals down. Specificity takes details and many times we do not remember details. Usually, we remember the general goal. Also, if you do not write it down, how will you know if and when you have accomplished the goal. A true concrete goal is one that is specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and time-specific. This is how you can tell a concrete goal from a general goal. Take your time and think about what goals you long to achieve this year. Write them down in general terms first. Then, write down exactly what you desire to accomplish and by when. You will be excited about the action plan you have come up with and you will have placed yourself on a good foundation of successfully accomplishing your resolutions for this year.