Dr. Romance Comments on The College Admission Scandal Involving Lori Loughlin and Her Husband Mossimo Giannulli

How can you make sure your marriage doesn't fall apart when you find yourself involved in a major scandal or other disaster? First things first, don’t blame each other. When we’re under attack it’s easy to panic, and panic can lead to fighting. Stay as calm as you can, and remain a team. You’re both going to be blamed, so no matter who’s at fault, it’s best to present a united front. You and your family do not even have to be "famous" for a scandal to ruin your social life. Everyone can be impacted socially; you could be shunned by your friends and family, your children could be bullied at school, or you could even lose your job if a major scandal were to be uncovered.
When a major scandal hits you and your family, what should you do? Here are some tips on how to handle a scandal that impacts your relationship:
1. Don’t make spur of the moment decisions: You may not be thinking clearly because of the media storm and the stress, so weigh decisions carefully

2. Don’t go it alone: Get professional advice. You may need legal advice or PR advice, and you will definitely need to talk to the wisest people you know. Don’t try to do this alone. Surround yourself with close friends and supportive family.

3. Don’t make statements: The first impulse is to defend yourself in the press, to your friends, even to law enforcement. Please keep your mouth shut. More may be revealed, it may turn out you weren’t part of the problem, and you also have to be careful not to incriminate yourselves unwittingly. So, keep quiet in public and in front of strangers, the press, and law enforcement and on social media.

4. Just stay off social media until things calm down a bit: you don't necessarily have to delete any social media, but let the storm pass.

The most important thing to remember if a scandal is uncovered is to protect your children and their mental health. Protect them as best you can. It may be a good time for them to go to Grandma’s or some other safe place, especially if the media is involved. School isn’t necessarily a safe place. They could be teased and taunted, and the press might find them. Talk to the school about how to keep them up with their studies, and keep them out of the public eye. Explain in terms they can understand that there’s a big story in the media, it’s not all true, and that you will keep them informed.

You can find details on how to do this are in How to Be Happy Partners: Working It Out Together http://tinyurl.com/zbe63u9

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