Eroticism: A Welcome Gift!
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Eroticism… mmmmmm… the word itself brings up images, fantasies, feelings. What is eroticism? Where does it show up in our lives? What is ‘erotic’ for each of us?
David M. Schnarch, PhD in his landmark work "The Making of the Sexual Crucible" defines eroticism as “the pursuit and delight of sensual pleasure”. According to Schnarch, “Eroticism and passion are the missing ingredients for the vast masses of sexually functional people who never experience the full impact of their sexual potential”.
So, which one of you is at their limit of your sexual potential?
Words such as hedonism, tantra and eroticism have gotten a bad rap in our "puritanical let’s not talk about sex and pleasure in our society attitude”. Funny, during a fun discussion with my 16 year old daughter, she pointed out the irony of living in a culture that advertises sex wildly, with a billion dollar pornography industry, but we 'can't' talk about sex... Very observant girl she is. So why is it so many folk just don't talk about eroticism? This truly human component of our being...is it really so wrong? Really?
Our notions of eroticism and our ‘judgments’ of ‘ok and not ok-ness’ come from our family, our teachers, our culture. Generation of generation of spoken and more often unspoken rules creating beliefs and choices, many of which are below our everyday level of consciousness, yet at the same time driving our thoughts, feelings and behaviors every day! What were your 'families’ messages about sex? About physical pleasure? Like many families, such things were not talked about, they were not named. Physical pleasure, sex and eroticism were considered taboo topics…
So, where does that leave us? As it is with so many things... I ask the question...What do you want?
Are you interested in connecting with more of your sexual potential? If so, you are like so many people who shy away from this source of spiritual and emotional greatness. This source of primal energy that stirs one’s soul… yes... primal energy stirred by our creative energy!
You don't really need a reason, so how about a great taste of eroticism today? Sound too far out, maybe, for many...and then for others...its one of the greatest places of play and pleasure!
Celebrate with your lover, your partner, your husband or wife. Communication...intimacy... honest open communication is the key... and your combined pursuit of pleasure!
Contact Jim on how to create more intimacy and joyous communication in your relationship at jim@trulyhumancoaching.com.... (And more eroticism!)
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About the Author
Jim is a Personal Life and Relationship Coach, Certified Trainer of NLP, an Inspirational Speaker and published author. He has been quoted for his coaching and training expertise in the Boston Globe, Fitness Magazine and in Crain’s Chicago Business.
Jim is the President of Truly Human Coaching where he provides personal and couples coaching for individuals and couples seeking very personal and intimate change and growth.
For the last 25 years, Jim has helped thousands of people to live more of the life they truly want. From social service to business management; from family therapy to training professionals; Jim has helped people create meaningful connections with others, including the most meaningful of connections, with ourselves. n n In his free time, Jim loves deep intimate times with his beautiful wife Connie; quality time with his children; as well as writing, reading meditating, exercise, marital arts, spiritual development, cooking and grocery shopping.
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