What Do You Want?

I've been exercising my "wanting muscles" for the past six weeks and I am amazed at the results.

As is often the case, my personal process and what's going on with my clients is very much in synch. I've watched two clients get the jobs of their dreams after they became crystal clear about what they wanted and how they wanted it to be. Others have let go of things they realized they didn't want, and are turning their energies to new, more exciting and meaningful work.

As for what I want, I've welcomed several fascinating people into my coaching practice as a result of envisioning who I wanted to attract and announcing openings in this newsletter. Sometimes it really is this simple: know what you really want and ask for it.

Why is this so powerful? What's the difference between knowing and asking for what we want and behaving like demanding children who've been up too long without a nap?

What I notice is that knowing and asking for we want requires a substantial degree of maturity and autonomy. It means listening at depth to the movements of our spirits and seeing past the glittering trophies that we've been trained to strive for. It means being willing to be big enough, honest enough, humble enough, and interdependent enough to ask for and receive what we want. It requires willingness to examine our motives and our resources: are we willing and able to ask for what we want in ways that are in alignment with our values?

Knowing and asking for what we want also means risking disappointment. A request is not the same as a demand, which is the key distinction between asking for what you want and childishly insisting that others satisfy your whims.

Wanting is the engine behind effective action. When I know what I want, I get and stay on course. When I am clear about what I want financially, for example, I have no trouble maintaining my records and making decisions. When I'm not clear, bank statements pile up and investments are made by default rather than decision.

In my own life and in the lives of my clients I see every day that great joy, accomplishment, prosperity and grace are available to us when we know and say what we want. nnn