The Wonderful Spirit In That Guy Giving You The Finger.

I found a wonderful little trick to change the way I see other people. Along the way, I found the person it had changed the most was myself.

Here's how it started: My wife and I were talking about how everyone has a spark of the Divine in them, no matter what path they may have chosen in life. Each of us have done something at some point we can be proud of.

It may not have been something momentous or long lasting. But all of us can look back in our lives and say, "yeah, I did a good thing that day."

Each of us can also look back on a point in our lives where we were profoundly distressed and vulnerable. We lost a lover, or a parent died, or something so bad happened it shook us to our spiritual core.

Everyone has had such an experience, even people who don't cultivate their spiritual nature to any extent.

We all know this, yet it seems that very often we don't honor these traits in the people we meet in our daily lives.

What would happen if you perceived in everyone you meet their ability to do something wonderful or to experience real vulnerability? Most likely, you would look at them with a new respect and see their potential for greatness.

It was a great conversation that we had, and I put it to the test the next day.

I was driving and came to an intersection with a four way stop sign. Another car and I came to the intersection about the same time, although I was there a second or two earlier and I was the driver on the right.

By all accounts, I was the car who was supposed to go first.

The young man in the car didn't see it that way. He rolled the stop sign and flipped his middle digit out the window of his pick up truck.

It was quite a sight. The sleeveless t-shirt, tattoo on the biceps, cigarette dangling from the mouth, rap music on full blast made for an interesting combination.

I was all set to offer my conditioned response to the gentleman, which would have been a similar greeting. But the conversation from the night before stood out in my mind.

At that moment I actually got a mental picture of him crying because something bad had happened. It changed my perspective immediately and entirely.

A moment later, I got a vision of him laughing with joy over something fantastic that had happened in his personal life. Shortly after, I envisioned him helping someone small move a heavy piece of furniture.

Did these things happen in this man's life? Probably, or at least something very similar. They may not have become his defining traits, but the fact that he has access to these things tells me that there's something lovable and valueable in all of us.

Under the right circumstances, all these qualities come out.

See the good in everyone. See it even when they're not showing it.

At the very least, it will reduce your own tension and frustration with the silly behavior we come across. You'll be able to detach from your own patterns of hostility.

At best, YOU will become the kind of person who brings out those qualities in others on a regular basis.