How to Acquire Self-confidence – The Ultimate Seduction

“Self-confidence gives you the freedom to make mistakes and cope with failure without feeling that your world has come to an end or that you are a worthless person.” – Anonymous

Self-confidence comes with the feeling that you are in control, that you are above the fray and that no one can hurt you physically or emotionally. It’s a state of mind that some people enjoy on an almost constant basis while, for others, it may only be felt on very rare occasions.

The lack of self-confidence can be debilitating to the point of ruining a person’s life. In the worst-case scenarios, professional help is needed but in most cases self-improvement techniques are enough to solve the problem.

The first thing that a person in search of more self-confidence should understand is that a lack of confidence is not some innate trait. We were all born with a clean slate. At birth, self-confidence was not an issue. Self-confidence is a construct that was formed through living experiences, something that started in our earlier years and has been evolving one way or another ever since.

Second, lack of self-confidence is often attributed to a specific condition such as, being too short, being too tall, not being pretty enough or being from the wrong side of the track. Those have very little to do with the real reason that a person lacks confidence.

Lack of self-confidence is the result of a weak ego and not the result of some physical shortcoming. People of all shape and form as do people of almost every conceivable condition have a healthy self-esteem and a very acceptable degree of self-confidence.

Next, the person who seeks to improve the self-confidence has to understand that every one of us is unique. We have our good side and our not-so-good side. That some people will like us and others will remain cold and that what matters most in getting others approval is the way that we feel about ourselves.

If we don’t like who we are and if we don’t feel worthy of acceptance, why should anyone else? Others get most of their cue from us to decide on how they will feel about who we are. We are constantly sending messages through body language that reveal our most inner feelings.

Those messages travel below the radar of consciousness but they very accurately reveal to the world how we feel about ourselves. People sense those messages and react accordingly.

All that being said, it becomes evident that the degree of self-confidence is very closely related to the degree of self-esteem or self-love. So, the quest for self-confidence should be done via an increase of self-esteem.

Getting to accept and love ourselves has been called the ultimate seduction. So called because it is the most important of all seductions. With it comes self-confidence and everything related to that most precious possession.

It does not matter from what angle we look at it seduction is seduction. Whether we want to seduce someone else or if the object of our seduction is ourselves, the process is the same. We seduce by being kind, nice, loving, supporting and above all appreciating.

That’s how we can seduce someone else and it’s also the way that we can seduce ourselves. So, to acquire self-confidence, all that we need to do is to get to appreciate and like whom we are… and the process will unfold naturally.