Internet Safety Tips to Protect Your Relationships

Internet safety has increasingly become a significant issue in the area of relationships. A common and obvious threat to your home and relationships is the subject of pornography. Pornographic material from the internet comes in two ways: solicited and unsolicited. Unsolicited material is sent to your inbox. An estimated 30 % of the unsolicited emails sent to the over 30 million users is pornographic or racist in nature. Solicited material is something a computer user seeks. There are over 70,000 pornographic sites that are available online. With such overwhelming access to online pornography the question becomes, “How can you protect your home from pornography?” Internet safety starts with setting ground rules – Speak with your spouse or children and establish “family computer rules.” that spell out reasonable content and time restraints. In the area of content, establish clearly what is acceptable as well as what would be considered inappropriate images (sexual, violent, etc). A time restraint might be “We agree to be on the internet only one hour in one setting.” Or, “We agree not to be on the computer after 10:00pm.” Statistics show the number of visits to pornographic sites increases exponentially later in the evening. This is due to the fact that there is greater isolation late at night or in the early morning hours. The location of the computer should be in a common living area. Since most people use laptops, one rule could be that they are also used in the open living area of the home. Internet safety starts with using screening devices – Screening devices come in a couple forms. One form is software that is installed on your computer that restricts access to questionable sites. Net Nanny is a popular software used by many. Another program that restricts access is called Blue Coat K9. These devices also have the ability to restrict the amount of time a user has access to the internet. Another screening device doesn’t limit access, but records activity and emails a report to the parent or accountability partner on a weekly basis. 3x Church is a great product. It works silently and generates either bi-monthly or monthly reports of internet activity. Internet Safety starts with honest and open discussion - Whether or not an individual views pornographic material is a matter of the integrity of the user. Ultimately, accountability only works if an individual seeks accountability. Yet, it is important to create a climate where a spouse or child feels safe to be able to share if they are struggling with pornography. Find ways to reward honesty without minimizing the dangers and impact of pornography on the home or relationship.